20 Signs A Man Is In Love With His Mistress

By Ruth Jesse

January 10, 2024   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

20-Signs-A-Man-Is-In-Love-With-His-Mistress

Do you feel the need to confirm if what you share with your married male lover is true?

If yes, then this is for you.

Even when he seems to be all over you, don’t take chances. It only takes about a month or two to do that.

A lot of people believe proving a married man’s intention in a romantic relationship is like predicting the outcome of a soccer game, where all you can do is guess the winner.

It is only tricky when you don’t have the right information.

In this article, you’ll learn about the signs to watch out for, the reasons why married men text other women, and ways to prove of a married man is over you.

Photo credit: Unsplash.com

🔮 Here are the 20 Shocking Signs A Man Is In Love With His Mistress 🔮

Helen had always thought Joe, her old college mate who is now married with two kids was only flirting with her the same way he did with different ladies back on campus.

However, she realized she was wrong after discussing it with a relationship expert. Below are the signs the relationship expert told her to watch out for.

1. He doesn’t flaunt his wedding ring around you

A man who doesn’t love his mistress doesn’t mind flaunting his wedding ring around her. He’s wise enough to know that would send a wrong signal to her.

When a married man is bold enough to put his ring on while he’s with his mistress, whatever they are having is not serious. He is simply there for pleasure, no strings attached at all.

We all can agree that the ring symbolizes eternal royalty. A man who doesn’t wear his wedding ring around you just doesn’t want to feel guilty whenever he is with his mistress.

He wants to enjoy every bit of the moment. He just doesn’t want to be reminded of anything that is not somewhat related to you when you are together.

If your man doesn’t fling his ring around you, it’s a good sign that he loves you.

2. He spoils you with expensive gifts and trips

Photo credit: Pexel.com
Photo credit: Pexel.com

He wants your life to be moving forward and has an advanced penchant for spoiling you. He doesn’t just make empty promises. He believes you richly deserve a vacation, gifts, vanity, and a full-throttled baby girl life.

He bankrolls you in everything that would bring you comfort. He wants your life as his mistress to be full of light and fun. He enjoys seeing you party hard, dance at the beach, and laugh a great deal.

Trust me, if it is a hopeless romantic love life, he wouldn’t be bothered at all to give you all these treats.

3. He teaches you things that would make you financially stable

Plus those gifts and treats, he empowers you financially, enriches you, and elevates you. He supports you in your dreams, and career, and exposes you to ideas that would make you good money.

It is crystal clear that what you have together is not just sex again. It is a sign that he’s all over you already. If he doesn’t love you, he wouldn’t go through the hassle to set you up financially.

4. He remembers even the small details about you

I confidently tell you that a married man who is in love with his mistress would remember every piece of information about her.

Look, a man in love with his mistress wouldn’t toil with every single detail she tells him.

He remembers even things you have told him about your parents and siblings.

He knows what your favorite song, color, dish, drink, amongst others.

You don’t need a fortune teller to be convinced that what he has for you isn’t just a fling. He is in love with you!

5. He doesn’t mention his wife when you both are together

He enjoys your company and wouldn’t want your mood to change whenever he is with you by constantly mentioning his wife.

Or tell me, would you not be upset if he keeps saying “my wife” in your conversation?

A man who truly respects your feelings wouldn’t want you to feel bad knowing that he still absorbs with his wife. He would always place you on a high pedestal, by saying amazing things about you, instead of mentioning his wife like most men who aren’t in love with their mistress do.

6. He expresses jealousy when you talk about other men

If you are a married woman, you’ve got to keep your lips sealed about your husband when you’re with your married male lover.

A guy who loves you, wouldn’t stand another man trying to get your attention. Never!

When he sees you have tons of friend requests from guys on social media, text messages from guys, or phone calls, he gets really upset.

This is indeed an eye-opener, if you are just a sex mate, he wouldn’t be bothered at all.

Being jealous, he has clearly shown that you hold a very special place in his heart and wouldn’t want to share you with anyone.

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7. He protects you even when his wife finds out and threatens you

He might have so much love and respect for his wife. But he can’t afford to let her harm you if she eventually finds out and threatens you.

He would defend and protect you at all costs. He loves you too much not to allow harm to come to you. He assures you that no one can come in between the both of you, not even his wife.

He loves his mistress equally or even more than he loves his wife.

Damn! Baby girl, that dude is just madly in love with you and can’t help it.

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8. You are his best friend

Whenever he finds himself in a ditch, you are the first person he calls. Any challenge that comes out of his personal life or even his work, he would choose to share with you and seek your opinions.

Can you see that you two are sharing more than just a bed?

The guy is in love with you. He always allows you to be yourself come what may. He helps you build your weaknesses and corrects you in love.

You two can share everything, from food to ideas. He’s deeply in love with you.

9. Because of you he plans on divorcing his wife

A married man who is intensely in love with you and couldn’t help it will want to have you by his side anytime, any day. He doesn’t care about the consequences of his actions, he just can’t stand having you away from him.

He wants it to be openly known to everyone that you are his. He is making plans of divorcing his wife and taking every step seriously.

Now, you need nobody to tell you that he adores you more than his wife.

Though men rarely leave their wives for their mistresses, it does happen sometimes.

10. He brings you closer to his inner circle

A man who truly loves his mistress doesn’t give a rat bum what people think anymore.

Most times he brings his mistress to special occasions, parties, weddings and some get together.

He believes in flaunting his mistress without being apologetic about it.

He wants you to know that you matter, and not just a mistress to him, but a real soulmate.

He doesn’t mind if his wife finds out and seeks divorce. He adores you and that’s final.

11. He compliments and kisses you at every chance he gets

A man who loves his mistress and wants a serious relationship with her will always let her know how much he finds her attractive, daringly, and very beautiful by kissing her often and raining delicious compliments on her.

He solely believes you are his woman, his soulmate, the love of his life. Your aura overwhelms him, he loves everything about you.

When a man is in love, it’s natural he finds everything about you constructively cute, even the smallest of things you think don’t matter.

If the man doesn’t do this for other women, it is a sign that he is in love with you.

12. He takes care of your child/children if you have any

Photo credit: Pexel.com
Photo credit: Pexel.com

Cheating husbands who love their mistresses would extend their love to their women’s kids.

Naturally, anyone that loves you, would love the people or things that matter to you. Your values are his values. Some married guys pay tuition fees, shopping, and vacations for their mistresses and kids. Here is a scenario…

John is a married dude who is in love with his mistress who has two girls.

He calls them “our girls”. He is always taking them shopping, last year he bankrolled an entire trip for his mistress and her girls in England.

Isn’t this a fantastic sign that he is madly in love with his mistress?

13. He wants to start a business together with you

A man who loves you will want to make sure you are financially stable. He takes every opportunity to build her up. He would love to start a lucrative business with you so that you both can make a lot

of money together. He always thinks about what you want in life, and how to help you achieve them.

This is him letting you know that being in love with you is only half of what you could truly enjoy.

“There’s so much more we could do together”

“We can be a force”

“We will make big money together”

These would always be his words to you.

14. He sets out time for self-care

A married man who loves his mistress will always want her to feel happier and relaxed.

Whenever he gets the chance, he makes it his priority to spend time enjoying self-care with you.

The self-care might be in the form of a quiet walk, practicing yoga, relaxing in a bubble bath together.

15. He finds beauty in your uniqueness and flaws

He won’t hate you because of your flaws, rather he would help you grow.

He finds beauty in your uniqueness and flaws. He will accept you for who you are and not want to appear too pushy. He will take pride in having you around him.

When he thinks of his future, you’re definitely in it. He respects you, he is always careful not to say anything that would get you upset. When the need arises, he respects your boundaries.

A married man who truly loves you will always find beauty in your uniqueness and flaws no matter what. Know this, married men fall for beauty.

16. He won’t make excuses, he will make time

Photo credit: Burst.shopify.com
Photo credit: Burst.shopify.com

Even when he has important events with his wife or friends, he cancels them just to be with you.

He misses important family events like a wedding anniversary or his child’s birthday.

He’s already treating you equally or even more than he does to his wife.

He appreciates you and believes you are worth his time more than anyone else. He wants to prove to you that you two are simply right for each other.

There’s no point beating around the bush, he has genuine feelings for you.

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17. He helps boost your self-confidence

We all can agree that almost everyone struggles with self-doubt and low self-esteem most of the time.

A married guy who is in love with his mistress wouldn’t want her to be struggling with self-doubt.

He would always find remarkable ways to help you build your self-confidence. He becomes a good friend that allows you to feel good about yourself. He wouldn’t do anything that would make you lose yourself in that relationship. He always reminds you of how strong and intelligent you are. He doesn’t want you to be caught up in any situation where you might feel you aren’t good enough.

You can see that what you have with him is not just a fling, but a serious relationship and he truly loves you.

18. He accepts responsibility for your part when an argument happens.

When disagreement occurs in your relationship, he wouldn’t want things to escalate.

He wouldn’t just throw a tantrum like a child and ignore you. He even goes the extra mile to apologize for the things you said or did that contributed. The guy wants you to understand that you both can overcome anything together in a mature manner.

He wouldn’t manipulate you into taking all the blame for a disagreement. Girl!!, man is in love with you.

19. He’s always honest with you

He shows he truly loves you by being honest with you. He wants to earn your trust completely.

He understands that trust requires being open and honest with you. He wouldn’t afford to lose you because of dishonesty. So he is always telling you everything the way it is.

He believes consistent honesty is a way of getting you to feel relaxed and proves his love for you mightily. He thinks about how you feel and this is a great sign that a married guy is in love with you.

20. He always wants to know your views on marriage

Why would a guy want to know your views on marriage, if he isn’t interested in you?

Trust me, he might probably be thinking of settling down with you and is curious to know what your beliefs on marriage look like.

Studies have it that 5% of married men end up marrying their mistress, your guy might fall under that category.

He wants to know if you think marriage is a piece of paper or if you think beyond that before he can make any decision.

💡 How do you know if you are a mistress? 💡

Photo credit: Rawpixel.com
Photo credit: Rawpixel.com

When a lady engages in a long-term sexual relationship with a man who is already married to another woman, she is referred to as a MISTRESS.

Most married men know how to hide their marriage from their mistresses to avoid their marriage from being ruined. They love their families so much and wouldn’t want little things to get them in trouble or crash their families.

Because of this, they’d do all they can to protect their marriages, even if it means posing as single guys to you.

Are you suspecting that you are a mistress to the man who you are dating?

If you think he’s playing games, simply stealthily look at these signs that would help you know if you are a mistress.

🕳 You have known him for years and he has never taken you to his house or any family members.

What do you think would possibly be the reason why a man you have been sharing your bed with for years hasn’t allowed you to go to his house or meet anyone close to him, don’t you think something is fishy?

It is quite easy to tell that he is keeping you as a mistress and doesn’t want you anywhere close to his home.

🕳 He always calls you at strange times and doesn’t take your call.

How can your lover only call you around 1 am, but can’t take your calls around 7 am or 10 pm? This only should open your eyes. He only calls you when it’s convenient for him and can’t stand getting his wife to suspect him.

🕳 He doesn’t store your mobile number with a sweet name.

How can someone who has promised you so many good things in life and sings to you always that you are his one true love, wearing a nice smile whenever you two are together, just store your number with Janet or Dr. Janet, ask yourself are you his doctor?

This is a big red flag, it shows something hiding under the rug. You need nobody to tell you that you are a mistress.

📱 Why does a married man text another woman? 📱

Photo credit: Burst.shopify.com
Photo credit: Burst.shopify.com

🛢 They could be just friends

Sometimes many women tend to forget that before they got married to their husbands they both had a life with other people in it.

As a woman, the fact that you’re married doesn’t mean your man has lost the friends or buddies he usually hangs out with. This could be one of the reasons he is texting someone else.

He could be checking up on an old schoolmate or a childhood friend. He could also be having an important discussion with his female colleagues.

You just have to make sure that he understands his actions so it doesn’t affect your marriage.

If you feel suspicious or hurt that your husband is always texting a particular woman and he is getting too attached to her, it’d be best to talk to him about it.

🛢 It could be a colleague or co-worker

Work can sometimes affect the relationship between couples, and that makes it imperative for them to understand each other’s job requirements and schedules.

If your man is a top official at work he could be keeping in touch with a female colleague, maybe his secretary, or team member to make arrangements concerning an ongoing project or contract.

This could be his only reason.

If you think otherwise, does he hide his phone from you?

If it’s a “no,” then there are chances he’s not cheating on you with another woman.

🛢 Another woman is constantly texting him

Sometimes men don’t tend to understand when a woman is hitting on them, another woman may be hitting on your man and he’s clueless about it.

It could also be that another woman needs his help urgently, and he is responding to her.

If you catch him doing so in secret, it could be that he’s unsure what your reactions would be.

🛢 He Could be having an emotional or sexual affair with her

Photo credit: Rawpixel.com
Photo credit: Rawpixel.com

No woman wants to find out that her husband is having an extramarital relationship. It is the last reason they want to believe even when they are obvious. The mutual trust they have for each other would keep them resolute that nothing funny is happening.

If your husband is always texting and giving all his attention to a particular woman all the time it could be true that he is cheating on you.

Cheating goes beyond having sex with another person. Your husband could be having an emotional affair with another woman by giving her too much attention. And before you know it, there is a communication gap between you.

Emotional cheating happens when your partner has an intimate connection with a third party, which is usually followed by a sudden change in behavior.

You can tell that they are beyond friends when their chats are more sexual and romantic topics.

🙅‍♂️ How do you know a married man is over you? 🙅‍♂️

🔅 He’ll go out of his way to help you

When a married man is in love with you, he’ll do almost anything to be your hero.

Have you heard about the term “hero instinct?”

It is an inbuilt feature in every man that’d make them go out of their way to help any woman they cherish.

He bought you lunch the day you had no money on you, he offered to pay your hospital bills. He can’t just keep his eyes away when you’re in need.

Do you think he’s doing all this because you are friends? Or do you feel he’s just being kind, after all, he’s a rich man.

Wake up! He is having a crush on you but he’s shy to ball the cat out of the bag because he’s married. He hopes that his attitude and generosity will give you a clue that he is into you.

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🔅 He compliments you 

Giving heartwarming compliments is such a romantic way to express love. And this time, it goes beyond the regular “you look good.” Just anybody can say that.

Look, a man who loves you would use every chance he has to melt your heart with his words. He cannot help but fascinatingly compliment you. He’d give nice comments about your womanhood.

He could tell you that he adores your hair, or he cherishes your smile, or he cherishes your voice.

Do you want a surer way to prove this?

Then look around, if he doesn’t do that to just anyone, he has fallen for you.

You don’t have to wait until he starts sending romantic love messages or tells you “I love you.”

He might just be waiting for the perfect moment to take your rapport some miles further.

🔅 He acts over-protective

Naturally, men are territorial. If a man is in love, you’ll find him exhibiting this male territory-marking behavior. When a married man is in love with a woman, he becomes over-protective.

Do you understand what I mean by being over-protective?

Let’s get a bit practical.

He will practically become defensive. He will start acting as a guardian and will attempt to chase different guys off.

If he is over-defensive around you, it is a sure sign that he has fallen for you.

🔅 He’ll always want to be with you

By right, a married man is supposed to spend more time with his wife. However, if he is consistently spending more time with you and giving you all the attention you need, then, he’s already paying attention to finer details about you.

A man who is in love with you will always want to be around you, he’ll want to go out with you and have fun with you.

He is willing to spend his free time, even abandon his wife, work, or an important event just to be with you.

At this point, he’s already having more than a crush on you. He loves you deeply.

🔅 He surprises and showers you with gifts

It is not your birthday and a married man goes out of his way to buy you hearty gifts like flowers, perfumes, pieces of jewelry, and the like.

He writes love poems and sings for you.

I’m sure you know actions speak louder than voice. His benevolence is a good sign that he is over you.

🔅 His body language says so

Love has a limit to how it can be hidden. Even if the guy isn’t vocal about it, his body language would make him unclear in the long run.

If you realize that he gets anxious around you when he is talking to you or stares at you, something is up.

Does he work out opportunities to touch you? I don’t just mean to hold hands. I mean parts like your hair, your back, cheeks, and other sensitive parts.

He will always want to sit close to you, maintain eye contact, move your hair out of your face, hold your hands, or even kiss your hands.

He does all these and you’re still doubting? Hell no!

These are major signs a married man has fallen for a woman. From his body language, you can tell if he’s head over heels for you.

🧐 Conclusions 🧐

As a mistress, you should be able to tell which side of your bread is buttered having read these 20 shocking signs, the reasons why married men text another woman, and ways to know when a married man is over you. I’d like to know what your thoughts are about being a mistress.

🤔 Relevant Questions 🤔

❓ What does a mistress mean to a man?

A woman is other than his wife with whom he has a romantic relationship.

❓ What does the mistress want?

Every mistress wants her man to give her due love, compliments, and attention.

❓ Can a man love his wife and girlfriend at the same time?

A: The common opinion is “no.” However, that is not absolute. A man can love two women – his wife and girlfriend at the same time.

Wanna know what every man is secretly obsessed with. It’s Something He CRAVES. More than love, more than money, even more than sex? WATCH THIS VIDEO NOW!

Ruth Jesse

Ruth is a life coach who specialises in relationships and career development. Outside work, she loves writing novels and guides for personal development.

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