Dating a Psychologist in 2022: Pros, Cons, Things to Know
When it comes to dating a psychologist, you may have several fears in mind. While dating a psychologist, keep in mind that you are dating a therapist who has to work on people. His job is to listen to the issues of people and to guide them accordingly. It’s true that psychologists analyze everyone easily, including you but it is a misconception that they know everything. Being a psychologist doesn’t mean that they are not human beings but they actually have all the feelings and emotions like us. Therefore, make sure you don’t believe in all the preconceived notions of being a psychologist and must do your research.
Although the relationship with a psychologist is a bit different than any other dating partner, it is worth it. Dating a psychologist has its own charms and would bring many positive aspects to your life. The only need to understand is to figure out your relationship with a psychologist and analyze what you should expect. When you have a better understanding of this relationship, you would enjoy it the most. To help you out, this article talks about the things you know about a psychologist. Along with it, it also guides you about the pros and cons of building a dating relationship with a psychologist. So, let’s learn it here.
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Where to Find Psychologists to Date?
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Things to Know About a Psychologist
A psychologist is a person who studies the process of how we think, behave, and feel in response to an upfront situation. These are usually known as clinical psychologists who shouldn’t be taken as medical doctors. The reason is that a clinical psychologist has not completed medical school and he doesn’t have experience in medicine. Instead, he studies psych majors of clinical psychology along with analyzing basics in studying psychology. However, he takes therapy sessions and discusses the matter with his patients. If a patient needs the training to improve his emotional resilience or requires treatment for being a good listener, the psychologist will help. Similarly, if his patients lack confidence in conversation or start feeling inferior, he would help them build emotional resiliency. Thus, a psychologist is not only associated with therapies but also counseling for a human being.
Most psychologists start seeing clients after just completing their bachelor’s degree while others wait until completing a master’s degree or Ph.D. Then, they apply the information presented in each of their course of psychology to their clinical practice. Some of them choose to practice in government hospitals and health care centers while others choose private practice at their clinics. While doing their private practice, many of them also build personal relationships with their clients. Building personal relationships with the clients doesn’t mean that these psychologists are flirting with the clients or not treating them well. Instead, it means that they pay more attention to resolving the issues of their repeated clients and are loyal to them.
Therefore, if you find a therapist or a psychologist through dating services, it’s important for you to first understand the nature of their work. When dating apps or dating services help you get in touch with a psychologist, keep some important things in mind. You must remember that helping people is what his job demands from him. For example, when a girl approaches him for therapy, don’t get jealous or feel annoyed. It is possible that she is worried about her poor emotional resilience and needs therapy for him. When a psychologist is not loyal to others (e.g. to his patients), he may not also be loyal to you.
A very interesting question in romantic relationships with a psychiatrist is to ask him if he is loyal to his profession and clients. When a psychologist will be loyal to both of these, he would also be loyal to you. On the contrary, when a psychologist doesn’t take a therapeutic relationship seriously, he may not be loyal to you as well. Therefore, it is the best way to check the loyalty and credibility of a psychologist as the research suggests. However, the opposite of it may also be possible in many cases.
Therefore, it is important to keep in mind that when you date a psychologist, don’t think that you are dating a psychologist. Instead, think as if you are dating a simple human being who treats patients to earn his livelihood. Also, don’t expect him to be a perfect human being in the hope to earn a double-edged sword. No matter what his designation is or how much experience he has in his field, treat him like a normal person who may also go through poor emotional resilience at times. Developing a better understanding of the lives of psychologists and therapists would help you enjoy this dating relationship.
Pros of Dating a Psychologist
While using the dating apps for dating with a psychologist, make sure to keep the pros in mind.
1. Excellent listeners
The best thing about dating a psychologist is that he is always an excellent listener. As they keep listening to people for hours in their daily life, they develop the stamina to listen to others. The best partner in your life is the one who is among good listeners. A psychologist can fulfill this expectation when you date him. With a psychologist, you can keep on discussing everything you want and he would never get bored of it. Even he would never lose interest in whatever you are saying to him because they have good practice at it.
2. Understands your feelings and emotions well
Similarly, another benefit of dating a psychologist is that he would better understand your feelings and emotions. As they spend most of their day evaluating the feelings and emotions of others, they understand you too. If your dating partner is a psychologist, he would always know what you are going through. He would also know how to cheer up your mood and how to make you feel better.
In contrast, another dating partner may be completely unaware of your feelings. This type of behavior is sometimes very hurtful and painful. Therefore, dating a psychologist benefits you in this regard.
3. Patient and calm persons who never over-react
Psychologists are the most patient and calm persons. They don’t only listen to you peacefully and calmly but also know the tricks to handle a situation wisely. No matter what happens in their lives, they never overreact to any situation but deeply analyze and then respond to it.
When you ask him about something that may provoke his anger, he would still answer in a calm and patient way. Even if you make a big mistake, a psychologist would never be bashed on you but stay patient while inquiring about things. Therefore, a psychologist is the best person to date who would always make you feel amazing.
4. Always speak out the issues to assure a healthy relationship
Psychologists always speak out about the issues that are creating problems in their relationships with others. Whether the issue is about the treatment of a friend or related to the truth about your link with him, he would discuss it. He won’t keep anger or anything like that in his heart that only worsen or complicate things. He won’t be the lab rat or won’t act as a lab rat because he has the guts to resolve the issues instead of experimenting with poor strategies to prosper relationships.
Instead, a psychologist would use the power of words and can even be a good teacher when it comes to strengthening relationships. He wouldn’t only be your good friend or partner but also your best teacher for getting plenty of helpful advice in life. He would discuss the underlying issues in your life and play his part to develop a healthy bonding with you.
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Cons of Dating a Psychologist
Just like the pros, dating a psychologist also comes with some cons which are as follows:
1. May ignore you for his private practice
One of the biggest disadvantages of dating a psychologist is that they may ignore you for his clinical practice. Suppose that he works in a hospital in the morning and has to complete hours in his clinic till night. With such a tough routine and a lot harder job, he may not be able to give you more time. As a result, you would start feeling inferior or hurt because of unfulfilled expectations.
When you love someone in the world, you expect him to be with you more than with anyone else. However, you can’t get enough time from your dating partner when he is a therapist too. Therefore, make sure you don’t lose patience and learn to deal with him in the best possible way regardless of how busy he is. Don’t start thinking that he is ignoring you, but provide him the support that he deserves.
2. His clients may affect your personal relationships
Another negative side of dating a psychologist is that his everyday clients may affect your personal relationship. For example, suppose that both of you have planned a special birthday party for each other at some noon. On the decided day, you reach the venue on time and start waiting for him. He comes almost an hour late and tells you that he is stuck in the patients. Would it affect your behavior at that spot? It will, for sure. You may get angry and question him if the patients were really more important than me, etc. Similarly, suppose that he doesn’t come to the location or leave the dinner in between because he got a call from the hospital.
All such situations are very hard to understand for a person who doesn’t have any idea about dating a psychologist. Therefore, it is crucially important to learn about the dating relationship with psychologists and therapists before dating them. Otherwise, it would only add stress and fights in your life in the stance of dead weight where your expectations would always hurt.
3. He always goes into the depth of things
Similarly, another thing that may make you stressed is his habit of always inquiring the things. No matter whether something is important or not, you will observe therapists go into the details of it. It may not bother you at times but it would for sure if this is a personal thing that you don’t want to discuss. Due to listening to the issues of patients, psychologists automatically develop the habit of inquiring the things. Even if they have no wrong intentions, they would prefer to ask you about every minor detail. Most of the time, it makes you furious and feels like a culprit who is being inquired about.
If you have the guts to share as well as explain everything to your partner, dating a psychologist would be a good choice. However, don’t go for it if you are an introverted person.
4. Other girls may approach him through dating services
When you can’t find him through dating services, why not someone else? If he is a member of any dating site and talks to you there, there are chances that he talks to other women too. Many psychologists love listening to the problems of people and they can’t live without talking to others. Their job built the ability in them to listen to the stories of people every day. If they don’t get someone to listen to at a day, they may start listening to the story of a woman online.
These types of talks usually affect the married relationships of therapists and psychologists. Even if they are not involved in more than a therapist-patient bonding, their partner may that it is wrong. You may get into doubt about the sincerity or loyalty of your partner when he attends to his women clients. Therefore, make sure you understand that psychologists deal with both men and women and it’s alright because it’s their job.
5. Your friends/relatives would always need him for all issues
It’s alright when your relatives or your friends need help from your husband because he’s a psychologist. However, it gets annoyed when they start interrupting you almost every alternate day for their issues. Even the bad thing is that most of them don’t even pay your husband for taking his services. Instead, they take benefit of their relationship with them and thus, always look up for free advice.
Even if this is not an issue for you whether they are paying or not, you would get furious at their lots of requests. It sometimes reaches a point where it starts to initiate fights between both of you. Your husband might not have the time to cover up the issues of your friends and family when he comes home so tired. He may get annoyed when he got home late at night and instead of relaxing, he has clients waiting for him at home. Such situations may interrupt the personal relationship between both of you.
6. He always knows your feelings or emotions
Last but not least, dating a psychologist would be problematic for you because you can’t hide anything from him. No matter what you are feeling, thinking, and going through, he would always get the cue. He would detect it even only by seeing you or talking to you. He would read the signs from your body language and would know that something is fishy.
Similarly, if you are very happy about something but don’t want to discuss it with him at the moment, he would still catch you. Psychologists are not only mind readers but they also read the faces of people. Therefore, you must keep it in mind before you choose a psychologist for dating.
Dating a psychologist is a good option for those who have the guts to talk about everything with their partners. Whether it is something related to your school or something besides your school, you should be clear and open. If you are an introverted person and can’t share your secrets with your man, don’t date a psychologist. Also, only choose a psychologist to date if you understand his job very well and have no issues or complaints with it.
An important piece of advice is to set up the rules before you get into such relationships with a psychologist. Your talk or preferences should not add stress to him when he is performing a treatment. Similarly, there should be no talk on complaints about not scheduling time for each other. It’s because anything can happen to his patients anything and he would have to attend to them as the first priority. Therefore, you should only progress with such relationships if you have a good understanding of their duties and profession.
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Author: Ruth Jesse
Ruth is a life coach who specialises in finance, relationships and career development. Outside work, she loves writing novels and guides for personal development.