At a certain point in a relationship, romance seems to fade. You get comfortable with one another and dinners out with romantic moonlit strolls give way to whatever is in the fridge and on TV.
Feeling comfortable without having to make grand, romantic gestures can be a good thing. That level of happiness with just being together is what many of us are ultimately seeking. It’s a slippery slope, however.
Romance keeps the fire burning, so to speak. Without it, the two of you can become distant. Giving up on romance is definitely a relationship mistake you should avoid.
So, what do you do when you want to put a little romance back into the equation? Check out these 7 easy ways to be romantic without being over-the-top.
1Make a mixed tape
Or at least the digital equivalent.
Putting together a few songs that remind you of your partner is a personal and thoughtful way to show that you are thinking of him. Surprise him by playing it at an unexpected moment, like during dinner clean-up and then ask them to dance. Not only is it sweet, but it makes a great excuse to get away from the dishes, too. And dancing, especially when you are not surrounded by throngs of sweaty strangers, can be very sensual.
2Profess your love to a stranger
Let’s be clear. It’s not your love FOR a stranger, but TO a stranger.
Next time you and your significant other are out at the grocery store or mall, keep your eye out for a friendly face. When you see someone that looks nice enough, tap him on the shoulder and tell him how much you love your partner. Of course, this takes a bit of finesse and humor but, if done right, it is completely flattering and romantic. Not only will your partner feel special, but the stranger you have just spoken to will have the chance to share his story.
3Write a note
It takes less than 5 minutes to write a thoughtful note and place it somewhere unexpected. Notes can be placed in lunch boxes, car visors or underwear drawers. You can place it in your partner’s favorite coffee mug or just about anywhere else your beloved is likely to find them. These little messages will add an unexpected smile to his day.
4Make a list
Everyone likes to know the things others appreciate about them. Make your partner a list of 3-5 of the things you love and/or appreciate about him. This doesn’t have to be long or too in-depth. It can be as simple as letting the other person know that you love the way he brings you coffee in the morning.
5Have a picnic
It doesn’t have to be an outdoor picnic. You can set something up inside. Just spread out a blanket in the backyard or living room and set-up a spread with foods the two of you enjoy. You can also get adventurous and choose a whole new cuisine that you have never tried. Add special touches like a handwritten card, music or a favorite drink.
If you want to do this outside, you could set up an outdoor movie on a tablet or laptop. If you prefer having picnic inside, you could get cozy with blankets and watch a movie from a new vantage point.
6Help with their hobby
Do you know your partner’s favorite hobby or pastime? Maybe he likes to read or collect something. You can pick up something related to what he enjoys and surprise him.
A reader might like some new books. If your partner is athletic or he runs or bikes, he might appreciate a new water bottle, a surprise race entry or a new gear related to his activity. It doesn’t have to be expensive- it is all about the thought.
7Provide a special delivery at work
If your partner is busy at work, show up with a cup of coffee, tea or whatever his drink or lunch of choice may be. If he happens to be busy or away from his desk, you can leave it with a note. In case your drink or meal is hot, you may want to let a coworker know so he can mention the treat before it gets cold.
These little things don’t require much effort or time but the memories they create can last a long time. They can even help you get through the difficult times in your relationship. Whatever you choose, these romantic gestures will surely make your partner valuable and appreciated.
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Author: Dr. Kurt Smith
Dr. Kurt Smith is the Clinical Director of Guy Stuff Counseling & Coaching, a Northern California counseling practice that specializes in helping men and the women who love them. His expertise is in understanding men, their partners, and the unique relationship challenges couples face today. Dr. Kurt is a lover of dogs, sarcasm, everything outdoors, and helping those seeking to make their lives and relationships better.