7 Signs Of A Toxic Marriage
“A good marriage is the union of two forgivers.” – Ruth Bell Graham
Getting married is one of the biggest decisions of your life, isn’t it? Your lifestyle changes a lot when you start living with another person. There are times when you have to make adjustments and fulfil your responsibilities towards your partner.
Also, there are disagreements. But you must take note of the fine line between fighting with your partner and living in a toxic relationship. Here are 7 signs of a toxic marriage.
#1 You Are Not Happy With The Relationship
When you sit alone and think about your marriage, something doesn’t feel right about the relationship. You are not completely satisfied with the life that you are currently living. You restrict yourself from sharing your emotions with your partner. There is a certain uneasiness between you two and there is no way to end it. Being unhappy could be the very first sign of a toxic marriage.
#2 You Constantly Feel Bad About Yourself
If you are losing your confidence and your partner is making you think that you are not good enough, not only for them but for anything in life, this could be another sign of a toxic marriage. One must understand that being in a healthy relationship means accepting each other just the way they are. You should be constantly encouraging and supporting each other in achieving your goals rather than trying to bring each other down.
#3 There Is Little Or No Freedom
Do you often feel controlled by your partner? Well, if you are in a healthy relationship then you might share how you feel with your partner and vice versa. But at the same time, both of you will still have the freedom to do what you want to do.
An opposite scenario to this would be when your partner does not respect your boundaries. You have to provide explanations about your expenses or they might be checking your phone to see who you talk to, where you go, et cetera.
#4 You Are Blaming Each Other For Everything
If you and your partner are busy in the blame game, it could be a sign of a toxic marriage. For instance, you might forget to pay the credit card bill and then your partner makes a big issue out of it. Then, you start blaming them for your mistake. If you encounter similar scenarios, it is time to change the situation as it could affect your marriage. You both need to start taking responsibility for your actions.
#5 There Is No Respect
What is the first thing that you notice in a lovely couple? It is not whether they look good together but how they treat each other. We suddenly start admiring a couple when both of them respect each other, whether it is respecting each other’s emotions or personal boundaries.
If you and your partner have forgotten how to treat each other with respect, then it’s a clear sign of a toxic relationship. We must understand that everyone has flaws and weaknesses, but that doesn’t give us any right to disrespect our spouses.
#6 There Are Secrets
You are in a toxic marriage if you or your partner are keeping secrets from each other. This clearly says that you do not trust one another and are not willing to share your life with him or her. While it is fine to keep your boundaries, it becomes a different story when there’s deception involved.
if you are seeing someone behind your partner’s back or you are doing certain things that your partner won’t agree with or vice versa, then this becomes unacceptable. There should be no secrets in a healthy marriage and hiding something from your partner or vice versa can lead to serious trust issues.
#7 You Argue No More
For many people, having too many fights are a sign of toxic marriage. However, not fighting at all could also mean the same. Maybe you are not discussing an issue with your partner because you know they would not handle it well, or you think that it’s just not worth your energy to discuss something with your spouse.
Whatever your reason is, not feeling the need to discuss matters with your significant other is not a very good sign. A healthy relationship means having to talk about issues, working on your differences, and resolving them together.
What To Do If You Are In A Toxic Relationship
If you can relate to any of these signs, you must think of finding ways to fix it and building a healthy relationship again. There could be different ways to do it. Firstly, you and your partner should communicate with each other as communication is key to a successful relationship.
Of course, no communication can succeed if there’s no listening involved, so both of you need to be willing to listen to each other. You may also seek professional help. For instance, many couples choose counselling or therapy to air out their concerns and improve their relationship.
Hopefully, this article has helped you identify the problems in your marriage that you were at first unable to understand. Just sit for a while and think about your relationship. Do you experience any of these signs? If yes, then you must decide and take the necessary steps to rectify the situation.