Dating a Felon: Pros, Cons, Scams, Things to Know in 2024
If you have fallen in love with a Felon, you could be wondering do you date them or not. Dating such a person comes with a package of challenges. Even though you date a convicted felon who has completed serving time in jail, your dating life won't be the same as someone dating a person without a criminal record.
Most convicts face stigma in society. Besides, many people will be pointing fingers at them and you too as their partner. As the stigma carries on to you, most companies will not prefer to employ someone with a criminal history. Many employers will turn down a job application from a felon.
However, felons are people too. They deserve a second chance after their time in jail. Besides, they deserve to be loved, but it takes a special person to accept them and date them. If you are that special person dating a criminal, stay tuned to learn the pros, cons, scams, and things to know when dating them.
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Things to Know About Dating a Felon
Let's assume that if you are dating a felon, they have completed their term behind bars. As a result, you can term the woman as an ex-convict because she is no longer under the probation officer. However, even though they have been set free, there are things you need to know.
First, the internet keeps records. Therefore, you can never hide from dating a felon. Public record searches help know what your convicted felon partner was charged for many years back. As a result, job applications or housing applications can be turned down easily, especially if they were charged with a violent crime.
Secondly, felons lose the right to vote after serving in prison. Even though they receive some benefits and are given public housing, their life is more challenging. When applying for a job, most employers will reject an application from criminals because they may not trust them.
The negatives of dating a felon can outweigh the positives because once a felon, always a felon. However, if you have found a compatible felony partner on a dating site, the positives are enough to make your relationship work.
Top Dating Sites for Felons or To Find Felons
If you are a former felon or someone who is looking to date a felon, check out these top dating and hookup sites:
Pros of Dating a Felon
∎ Ex-convicts are People Too
A felon is not always a bad person. They only made bad decisions such as substance abuse at one point in their life, which led them to a felony. That could be the only choice they had at that time. However, when given a second chance, they can do things differently.
You can find a changed criminal on a dating site who is ready for a family. Yes, they are guilty of their mistakes by being willing not to repeat them. Such a woman shouldn't be denied a chance to fall in love. She deserves a partner who is willing to nurture and grow a relationship with them.
∎ They Can Deal with Bad Situations
Life behind bars is different from the normal life you live. It makes one more resilient even in the toughest situation. This is because they have gone through the worst while serving their charge in jail.
Therefore, when you date a felon, they can stick with you through thick and thin. They understand that tough situations can be an opportunity for them. As a result, you can grow together as a family and overcome the challenges you may face.
This might not be the case if you had dated a woman who has never been behind bars. Some may only stick by you during your highs. And when tough situations such as job loss come your way, they leave you for another partner. However, ex-criminals are likely to persevere during low moments because they understand it is for a season.
∎ They tend to be More Understanding
A woman with a felony conviction is likely to be more lenient in life as they have tasted the worst in humanity. They know what it means to live without freedom. As a result, they act more maturely.
When in jail, they learn a lot and start viewing life differently. Therefore, they tend to be easygoing and more gentle. They are likely to listen to you when you wrong them instead of making their conclusions.
Besides, dating them can lead to fewer dramas in life because she can give you a chance to explain why you did something. As a result, you will be solving your issues amicably without having to fight or engage in disrespectful conversations.
Cons of Dating a Felon
◉ Stigma Attached
Being a felon in society is not easy, and dating one comes with the same weight. People will always judge them without wanting to know whether they are guilty or not. As a result, many will be pointing fingers at you, saying, ‘ he is the one dating a criminal.'
To make it worse, it can even extend to your relatives, and some may not be comfortable interacting with your felon partner. This can be tough because there is a stigma attached to you. As a result, you may find it challenging to attend public meetings.
People stigmatize felons because they are not sure if they have changed. The worst-case scenario is when you hear your friends gossip about your felon partner.
◉ Lack of Employment
Apart from the stigma attached to felons, these people go through the trouble of unemployment. It is more challenging when sending job applications asking whether you have ever been charged with a felony.
Even though employers shouldn't stigmatize felons, most will not choose a felon over a person without criminal charges. Besides, there are benefits to employers who hire felons, but most will skip a job application from such a man.
As a result, dating a felon can be a burden because securing a job is not easy. As a result, they will depend on you for almost everything. This can be tough and you face financial constraints from time to time.
◉ Housing Challenges
Most felons may not afford public housing because the government doesn't give them such benefits. This can strain your relationship because housing is a basic need. Felons have trouble getting gainful employment to add salt to the injury.
Most apartment owners might not lease an ex-convicted guy even if their crime was not violent. Their only option is public housing which can take time to secure. Therefore, if you are in a relationship with a felon and end up living together, you will provide housing. And if you are not living together, you have to allow them to come in because she may not find another place to live in.
◉ Limitations to Benefits
Apart from a lack of employment and housing challenges, felons have limitations to benefits. As a result, they can't enjoy federal government benefits such as voting, SSI benefits, food stamps, and other benefits that other citizens enjoy.
Even though they can manage to pay for food and other essential needs, they may go through a time of sickness or any other issue that can lead to financial constraints. As a result, your relationship can be on the rocks.
Besides, dating a felon can be fun, but life can be tough because government benefits make life more bearable. However, you have to go the extra mile to provide if they were charged with a felony.
◉ They Might Repeat the Crime
If your partner was convicted of a crime, the chances of repeating this mistake are higher than for a person who has never committed it. Some make the same mistake because they feel bad for being caught. Therefore, the best way to revenge is to commit the same mistake.
This can lead to another term in jail when caught. Besides, their serving time in prison can be longer. It could be overwhelming for you as the partner, especially if you have started a long-term relationship. Besides, it may lead to separation or divorce because it becomes hard to trust them again.
Scams to Watch Out when Dating a Felon
Even though a felon can be a good guy only if he was found at the wrong place or the right place, but at the wrong time, dating them is not a bed of roses. It is important to do background checks because you may fall into their trap.
Some people have mastered tricks to scam others. Here are some red flags to watch out for;
◎ Attention Seeking
Some people pretend to be ex-cons to grab your attention. They may keep chatting with you to seek sympathy. Therefore, when you meet a felon, please get to know their details. Ask them about their lives, how long they were in prison, and what they were charged for. With such details, you can truly see if someone is an ex-felon or wants to grab your attention.
◎ Financial Using
Another trick used by felons is phone calls now and then asking for financial assistance. Since they are not eligible for SSI benefits, food stamps, and other benefits from the government, they may use it as an excuse to be asking for money often.
Therefore, do a background check to know the truth. Some may not be after dating instead, they may be after your money. If you find they have been using you, you better leave.
◎ Emotionally Draining
A felon can be after your emotional support, apart from your finances. They may be looking for a shoulder to lean on because of what they have gone through. Yes, it is good to support them emotionally, but if dating a convicted felon sucks you emotionally, it can be alarming.
Even though they need your emotional support, remember such people may have used emotional manipulation in the past. Therefore, people who date felons should keep their eyes open to avoid falling for their trap.
Questions to Ask When Dating a Felon
People break the law differently and what led your partner behind bars is different from another person's story.
To avoid falling for scams, these are important questions to ask and know if they are really after your love:
⫸ The offense they committed
A court can charge you for a felony conviction like murder or bank robbery. Since criminal activities vary, it is important to know what lead your partner to go behind bars. Whether they were convicted for a white-collar crime or violent crime, both are the same because these are offenses against their friends and business associates.
When you know the offense they committed, you can tell the kind of person you are dealing with. Hence, if you choose to date them, it will be easier to handle your relationship because you know what your partner can do.
⫸ Their age when they committed the crime
If you happen to meet a felon on a dating site and you fall for them, inquire about their age when the crime happened. Is it in their teenage years or when they were adults? Even though it could be because of peer pressure that made them be at the wrong place, that is not an excuse.
⫸ What leads them to engage in criminal activity
Even though it may be past tense, it is important to understand why the ex-convict ended up in prison. Besides, they shouldn't avoid talking about it. It helps you know this person better even as you enter into a relationship with them. Besides, you can tell whether they have learned and changed their perspective from their long story.
How to Find a Felon
Some people meet their partners before the felony conviction, and others meet in parks or bars by chance. Besides, guys don't like to tell their felony stories, and therefore you may not know where to find felons.
If you are an ex-con who wants to start a relationship with a fellow felon or take up the challenge of dating one, there are several dating sites to find them.
First, you can look out on Adult FriendFinder. The dating site hosts more than 55 million registered users from all over the world. It allows members to discuss any topic, and they help each other by being resourceful. Through this site, you can learn more about dating a felon and what it looks like. All you need is an extensive network to connect with other users. Besides, you will be required to purchase a monthly subscription to access features beyond messaging.
Another dating site for felons is the Felony dating service. The site allows felons to post their profiles. Besides, you will find guys who are currently in jail or on probation in different parts of the world.
Meet a Prisoner is also a dating site to meet and date a felon. It hosts people who are still behind prison bars but searching for a love relationship. Besides, the site has free inmate forums, inmate videos, and links to inmate people.
There are other dating sites where you can find an ex-convict. To benefit from such sites, you need to sign up and create a profile.
Wrap Up
When you hear the word felon, you start thinking of murder or the worst crime in the entire universe. However, people involved in serious crimes have a desire for love. If they have completed their term in prison, that is past, and if they are still behind bars, they can come out and change.
If you date a felon by chance, there is the positive and the bad side of the relationship. Even though the challenges are more, felons can be easy to date because they understand and preserve the worst in a relationship. However, watch out for some traps these people can put in, like financial and emotional use.
If you are looking to marry a guy who has been behind bars, there are dating sites such as Adult FriendFinder where you can meet them. However, as you interact, get to know why they were found at that place at the wrong time and if they have changed. Even though the stigma carries to you, it is possible to date a felon, have a long-term relationship, and even get kids together.
