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10 Ways To Make Yourself (And Everyone Around You) Miserable
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10 Ways To Make Yourself (And Everyone Around You) Miserable

 

(And don’t tell me you don’t want to be miserable. I’m pretty sure you’re already doing at least a few of the things on this list…)

  1. Turn Molehills Into Mountains
    When your printer jams, it’s not just annoying, it’s a disaster. When your car develops an odd rattle, it’s not just normal wear and tear, it’s clearly going to cost a fortune to fix. When your son swears at you, it’s not just a bit of acting out, it’s the first sign of junior delinquency.

However small your problem, magnify it until it becomes overwhelming. You can only be properly miserable when you have huge problems.

Imagine all the worst-case scenarios that could result. Lie awake at night, dreaming up new ones.

And you’re in luck: there’s a ready stock of these things on the daily news. Just switch on CNN, and start worrying…

This habit is self-reinforcing: the more the pile grows, the more reluctant you’ll be to tackle it. And guess what? The bigger it is, the more it’ll prey on your mind. An easy way to make yourself miserable.

Of course, to make sure that everyone else is just as miserable as you, be vocal, and tell people that it’s all their fault that your life is so screwed up. 

This is a fast, easy and reliable way to become miserable and to stay miserable. If you do it well, you’ll be convinced that you have no power to change yourself.

If every word that comes out of your mouth is a negative one, you’ll be doing a great job of maintaining your miserable mood – and dragging down everyone else’s mood to match it.

Always insist that you don’t need help. Make yourself believe that the person offering couldn’t possibly lighten your burdens … and make sure they know that they’ve stepped out of line by being willing to lend a hand. (They won’t offer again.)

If you’re feeling demotivated, lethargic and dispirited, don’t fight it. Let yourself spend the whole weekend sitting around in your pyjamas, playing video games. Then beat yourself up (see number 6) for not getting anything useful done.

Make sure you’re burning the candle at both ends – and hating it. Go to bed miserable, and wake up miserable. What more could you want?

I’m hoping you’ve not taken the advice in this article too seriously! If you’ve got a “how to be miserable” tip to add, pop it in the comments. Even better, if you know a great way to cheer up and get some perspective, let us know that too…

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