18 Ways On How To Let Go Of Someone You Love
Not all relationships end up being like Romeo and Juliet. At different times in our life’s we overcome or outgrow our partners. At this point, you can no longer empower or fulfill your partner’s dreams and desires.
We, therefore, have to move on with our lives.
Holding back someone we used to love prevents us from achieving our goals and growing healthy, mentally, physically, and emotionally as a person.
I know it’s hard to let go of someone you love but it will be for the best of both of you.
The old memories, old texts, old albums, and physical items that belonged to your significant other are some of the precious things we tend to cling to.
The feeling of not having these items with you can really seem to be difficult for us, hence hurting our mental ad emotional health indirectly.
The fear caused by these emotions and feelings causes more damage than good, but is this really true? According to the many studies that have been carried out, those who were barely preoccupied with their ex have better well-being psychological than those who were deeply connected.
Do you want to let go of someone you loved for the rest of your life? Read throughout the article and learn some of the ways of how to let go of someone you love?
Table of Contents
- 🏺 Here are the 18 Ways On How To Let Go Of Someone You Love 🏺
- ◈ Ways to stop thinking about someone for good ◈
- ◉ Tips to let go of someone you love so you can get back to living the life you want ◉
- ❂ Why is letting go so painful? ❂
- ❣️ When should you let go of someone you love? ❣️
- 📝 Conclusions 📝
- ⚜️ Relevant Questions ⚜️
🏺 Here are the 18 Ways On How To Let Go Of Someone You Love 🏺
1. Make the fantasy disappear.
Dr. Vilhauer, advises individuals undergoing this process to let go of all and any fantasy one might have. It is very crucial to always put your focus on something else, despite the great moments you both had.
They had to come to a stop for a certain reason.
When you are trying to figure out what’s best for yourself and you find yourself recalling some of the best days you had with your partner, it is important to try and focus more on the most painful events you incurred during your relationship.
This, however, brings your mind back to a neutral state and helps you figure out the truth of what your relationship was like. Always accept the reality and move towards improving yourself.
2. Allow yourself to let go, through learning the lessons.
The moment you sit back and figure out the causes of your break up then you will be doing yourself a favor by trying to move on easily. This helps you think of that person as your past endless of your resent and future.
3. Go back to your family and friends.
During this crucial time, you wouldn’t want to be alone, therefore it’s advice you move back to your parent’s home or close to your family for emotional support.
Going back doesn’t entirely mean going back to live with your parents but engaging yourself in family activities that will help you keep your mind off the break-up.
Friends, on the other hand, engage you in their co-curriculum activities like going out for hikes, movies, parties, and many other fun activities.
By doing this you are allowing yourself to have some fun and keep your mind entirely off the break-up. This will show you that you don’t however need someone to be happy.
You could always ask for emotional support from your family and friends just like they would depend on you when the same thing happens to them.
4. You might want to ask yourself if the relationship is worth keeping.
One of the best ways to stop relationship anxiety is by having a look at whether it is worth keeping in the first place. How do you get to find out?
Take a look at whether the person you are with is the best and right for you, most of the time the answer might be no.
Although it may not always be that clear to know whether you should or should not keep your relationship, you can always refer to Dr. Weiss Robert’s article on the “12 crucial Questions About your Relationship.
This will help you figure out whether its worth the keep. In this article, you find some questions like:
⌕ Does your partner support you?
⌕ Do both of you invest in your relationship?
⌕ Do you enjoy each other’s company?
5. The first thing you should have done is cutting off any communications with your ex.
Today’s psychology advises people to first cut off contact with their exes. This helps you move on easily.
The best thing you’d ever do to yourself is if you loved someone so deeply and felt that that attachment can’t be broken, then it would be better to cut off communications with that person.
Giving yourself some space to heal after that tough time would be a rough road and tough one. You can allow yourself to heal faster and if it does matter that much to you, you can opt to have a friendship connection with that person.
But before that, avoid any conversations with that person.
6. Take good care of yourself through self-care.
When you are experiencing emotional pain it is very hard for you to take good care of yourself. You are always lazy and not in the mood of doing anything.
When you don’t take good care of yourself it is hard for you to let go of the issues disturbing you.
You will always be able to juggle up your emotions but it will always be difficult and almost impossible to control what you are going through. Your actions will always influence your emotions either positively or negatively.
You can always take good care of yourself by basking out in the sun, going for facials, taking pedicure and manicure therapy sessions.
You can take yourself to the spa or massage sessions. It helps to enlighten your moods naturally. It also helps to make you feel less anxious.
7. Find something that will distract you.
When you are undergoing a break-up it is best to engage yourself with mindfulness activities that promote that positive energy boost.
Watching movies, doing yoga activities, listening to music, going farming, skydiving, and other co-curricular activities can keep you distracted from your ex.
With this kind of approach you are able to help yourself grow physically, emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually.
These activities help you to avoid the persistent directive thoughts of your ex, therefore, causing a lower emotional response towards your ex.
8. Always have faith that you will find someone better than your ex.
People come and go in our lives and it is a situation that we all have to accept and adapt to. Some come into our lives as a lesson, others in form of happiness, and others come to ruin it.
It is not always a smooth path for each one of us to find our true love with one go but if you are lucky enough you will get one.
One key way of letting go of someone you love is socializing with other people to keep the thoughts of break up away from our minds.
Proven Dating Courses that works like a charm:
|The Tao of Badass||7 Simple scientific tricks to have any woman you want|
|How To Find The Man Of Your Dreams||Attract the Man of Your Dreams -- and Receive a Marriage Proposal in 12 Months or Less|
|Text Chemistry||Learn a special kind of text message that you can send a man right now that will unlock a hidden, ravenous desire for you.|
|The Devotion System||Learn how to avoid making these attraction-killing errors and reveal a powerful set of words I call a "Devotion Sequence" that make a man lust uncontrollably for you (even if he says he's not interested).|
Finding someone new will always be a difficult and rough road. This is something that needs enough time to build the bond.
There are more than billions of people in this world, letting go of that one person shouldn’t be that hard. Among those many people you will be able to find someone better and someone who will treat you right like you deserve.
Always be positive and have faith that things will be fine and okay with time. Believe that you will be a kind person that will love you.
9. Be social and try out new stuff.
You should always give yourself a chance to meet new people and try out new things in this life. It is not always about love and finding Mr. or Mrs. Perfect. Enjoy your life when you possibly can.
Become an outgoing person. Visit your dream places, try out new foods, new activities and enjoy yourself.
You can opt to join a community club or even become a volunteer in church activities. Through this, you are able to mingle with people and get to know how others deal with their emotional breakdowns.
Being adventurous gives you the ability to know what type of activities interest you and also your new friends can guide you through the new you and help you grow as a person.
10. Become more active on what you like most.
Since now you don’t have anyone in your life, you are free to go all out on your interests and passions. You have the capability to focus on your passions.
If music or singing is your passion you can try out singing in public at karaoke nights or even in events. Take your passions to the absolute next level.
This keeps your mind engaged and focused on what you love rather than regretting what you have already lost. Your passion can become your new career, you will never know.
11. Have positive affirmation thoughts and spoken words.
Our minds are built to think widely and make positive and negative thoughts. At this time we want to think and speak out loud the positive affirmations fluently.
Some of the things you can encourage yourself with are:
⌕ I will always be happy even without my partner around.
⌕ I will find someone better. Someone who loves me and appreciates me for who I am.
These are just mere samples of the positive affirmations that you should have if you are or not experiencing a break-up.
12. Change that story in your mind.
Research says that a lot of your reality is shaped by your perceptions. Every time you think that something is true or false, your actions and mind will always create a way for you that makes it true or false.
It is the same case as to we think that we can’t live with someone then that kind of perception is created in our minds and made true. It may sound to be a petty thing at the moment but its all a reality. When you change the story to you can live without that person then everything becomes okay.
When you change your mindset to being positive you will home and dry and it will become very easy for you to move on and let go of that person. Focus on reality and make dramatic changes for your benefit.
Know how to Attract Into Your Life The Events and Circumstances That Vibrate In Harmony with Your Dominant Thoughts. CHECK THIS OUT!
13. Give yourself the chance to be mad, sad, cry, or whatever feeling you have build up.
It’s absolutely okay to feel sad, mad, and angry when someone has left you. Studies show that when one cries out their troubles it is easier for them to let go of the past and move on quickly.
Let the tears flow, feel that pain inside of you. This will help to reduce the pain that you might be going through. When you cry you emit chemicals that cause you to have stress so one of the benefits of crying is releasing stress.
The first time I broke up with my first love I let myself cry, feel mad, and sad for a while. It helped me overcome that feeling. It is not okay to pretend that you are okay, be honest to yourself and feel the grief.
14. Have that virtue of forgiveness and find it in your heart to forgive the person but only for good reasons.
When you forgive someone it helps you let go of all the bad things this person has done to you. You are able to live by yourself without any anger.
You’re happier than before. This method has been proven to have helped a lot of individuals who are undergoing break-ups.
Forgive someone from a place of empathy as professor Kathy Belicki says. Take a step back and look at why that person acted the way he did. Belicki argues forgiveness in this way leads to more serenity.
15. Do what will help you let go.
The research was done on mending a broken heart that found just doing something you think will help you feel better can lessen your pain. It goes to show how powerful your mind can be in shaping your reality.
16. Reflect on the bad habits of your ex.
Certain ways have been designed to cope with a break-up. There is no particular method or way that is an assured or sure bet that you will overcome it but you can find ways to reduce the hurt. The first one being regularly thinking about your former lover’s bad habits.
This made all the good things that made you miss your ex, subside. Its a way of avoiding the good embracing the bad to forget the memories. Even though it may not be a good coping mechanism, it works for the short term.
Acceptance is a very important stage in getting over your ex. It’s okay to still love your ex and not feel like anyone is judging you or you are lying to yourself. Accepting that you loved your partner and that it won’t be easy to get over them is a step towards getting over your ex.
18. You can always opt for a rebound relationship.
It has been proven that rebound relationships help a lot of people get over their true loves very fast. it gives you the option of feeling better again. It is advisable to take some good quality time before deciding to date all over again.
Some may choose to wait for one or two months before dating again and others just immediately. Yes, it is a good way to get over someone you used to love but don’t you feel as though you have rushed things.
Also for how long one decides to start dating again depends on how long they were dating with their previous lover. In short, just do what you feel is right for you.
◈ Ways to stop thinking about someone for good ◈
► Always distract yourself with something.
The absolute best way to stop thinking about something is to find something that can distract you. You can opt to do some physical exercise, listen to music, watch movies, start a youtube channel, go hiking, or even play an instrument.
This will help keep your mind off the break-up or someone. Your body, mind, and spirit are connected therefore a trigger of one can cause great trauma. You will always enjoy doing something physical and it will keep your mind engaged and away from the thoughts that would be torturing you throughout the day.
► Talk it out with someone you trust with your personal issues.
We normally say a problem shared is half solved. When you share your thoughts with someone you get to reduce the burden and pain that drains you out your energy. That pain is withdrawn from your heart and you can get to go about with your normal activities.
When you talk with someone you get to hear their side of the story and their perspective on your struggle. It will be useful if you share out with someone that you share some good connection with and you are absolutely free to tell them your point of view and how exactly that situation is affecting you mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
This alleviates the stress that comes with you having to think about someone or something you wish you hadn’t thought of.
► Engage yourself with some mindfulness exercises.
Meditation and yoga would be perfect mindfulness exercises that you can adopt in your daily life activities. These activities require no interpretations and judgments of your current emotional feelings or senses.
You are able to engage your whole body, mind, and soul in the environment’s atmosphere helping you decrease the rate of stress and allowing your body to feel relaxed.
These kinds of exercises require a lot of practice and they are time-consuming. The more you engage yourself with them you are able to quickly forget the break-up and move on easily.
During this moment you are able to channel your thoughts into one major activity and that is the current ongoing activity. If you happen to find more interesting mindfulness exercises you can opt to adopt them as well.
► Change your thoughts or reframe them.
I know it might be a struggle to stop thinking of someone you have been with for a long time. If you ideally want to stop this then it’s the high time you change your thoughts and process the new thought.
Always finding a resolution to your problem alone can be hard.
You should always consider and keep reminding yourself that you are in control of your thoughts and how you handle them will affect your life.
Keep your mind filled with positive and moving thoughts. Always recall that these are mere thoughts and you can decide to ignore them or let them eat you up the whole day.
► Choose to write your thoughts down.
I found myself writing down everything that affects me. This will help you remove all the anger and sadness in one paper.
This is similar to talking to someone but if you do not have a trustable partner or friends your paper and pen can become your friends for the day. Write down everything that is affecting you and making you not stop thinking about it.
This helps in clearing your mind and taking out disturbing thoughts. After doing all this throw the paper, burn it, or even shred it into pieces.
You will not be able to access these thoughts anymore and hence you won’t be able to remember what was disturbing your heart.
► Remove everything that reminds you of them in your home or apartment.
The first thing that I should have started with is this. Having a load of items of your past keeps you from not moving on with your life. Get up and get rid of everything that reminds you of them.
Nicholas Hardy said, “Our thoughts are generated by triggers that remind us of an actual experience, individual, previous event.” It can be inform of anything, gym, clothes, restaurant, or even gifts.
Always keep in mind that I am not saying you separate yourself from things that you love. But during the healing period, it would be better if you abstain from those places as much as possible.
◉ Tips to let go of someone you love so you can get back to living the life you want ◉
⫸ Make a positive mantra to counter the difficult contemplations
How you converse with yourself can either push you ahead or keep you stuck. Frequently, having a mantra that you advise yourself in the midst of enthusiastic agony can help you reevaluate your musings.
For instance, says clinical therapist Carla Manly, Ph.D., rather than stalling out in, “I can’t really accept that this happened to me!” attempt a positive mantra, for example, “I’m lucky to have the option to track down another way throughout everyday life — one that is beneficial for me.”
⫸ Make actual distance
It’s normal to hear somebody say that you should remove yourself from the individual or circumstance that is making you be disturbed.
As indicated by clinical analyst Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., that is not an impractical notion. “Making physical or mental distance among ourselves and the individual or circumstance can assist with giving up for the straightforward explanation that we are not mulling over everything, measure it, or being helped to remember it so much,” she clarifies.
⫸ Accomplish your own work
Zeroing in on yourself is significant. You need to settle on the decision to address the hurt that you’ve encountered. At the point when you ponder an individual who caused you torment, take yourself back to the present. Then, at that point, center around something that you’re thankful for.
⫸ Practice care
The more we can carry our concentration to the current second, says Lisa Olivera, an authorized marriage and family advisor, the less effect our past or future has on us.
⫸ Be delicate with yourself
In the event that your first reaction to not having the option to relinquish an excruciating circumstance is to scrutinize yourself, it’s an ideal opportunity to give yourself some grace and sympathy.
Olivera says this looks like dealing with ourselves like we would treat a companion, offering ourselves self-empathy, and staying away from correlations between our excursion and those of others.
“Hurt is unavoidable, and we will be unable to ready to stay away from torment; notwithstanding, we can decide to treat ourselves merciful and affectionately when it comes,” Olivera clarifies.
⫸ Permit the negative feelings to stream
In case you’re dread of feeling negative feelings is making you keep away from them, relax, you’re in good company. Indeed, Durvasula says that on multiple occasions, individuals fear sentiments like anguish, outrage, frustration, or trouble.
Maybe than feeling them, individuals simply attempt to close them out, which can upset the method involved with giving up.
“These negative feelings resemble riptides,” clarifies Durvasula. “Allow them to stream out of you… It might require psychological well-being mediation, yet battling them can leave you stuck,” she adds.
⫸ Acknowledge that the other individual may not apologize
Sitting tight for an expression of remorse from the individual who hurt you will dial back the most common way of giving up. In case you’re encountering hurt and torment, it’s significant you deal with your own mending, which might mean tolerating that the individual who hurt you won’t apologize.
⫸ Participate in self-care
At the point when we are harming, it regularly feels like there is only stung. Olivera says rehearsing self-care can appear as though defining limits, saying no, doing the things that bring us happiness and solace, and paying attention to our own requirements first.
“The more we can execute self-care into our regular routines, the more engaged we are. From that space, our damages don’t feel as overpowering,” she adds.
⫸ Encircle yourself with individuals who top you off
This basic yet incredible tip can assist with helping you through a great deal of hurt.
We can’t do life alone, and we can’t anticipate that ourselves should get past our damages alone, either, clarifies Manly.
“Permitting ourselves to incline toward friends and family and their help is a particularly great method of restricting detachment as well as of helping us to remember the decency that is