How to Fail, so you never Lose !

By Tives Community

June 8, 2015   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

This is generally how we perceive failure, give or take a few minor details:

We see a hole in our life and decide to fill it
We dream of the day when we will achieve our goal
We research, plan, strategize, agonizing on details for days
We seek out our team/community/tribe/buyers/influencers/mentors
We invest our blood, sweat and tears putting our plan to action
We wait for the hole in our life to disappear
We wait some more, after all we have done everything we could
Slowly we come to accept the fact, that the hole’s not going anywhere, at least not right this moment
Then, it is time to celebrate our Wins

If you are asking what Wins, check this:
We will never repeat the same path again because we now know the outcome, that makes us a wiser person than before
We now have a list of actions, a “STOP” list, that we need to proactively stop doing because they are not adding value, a ” START” list, that we need to start doing because we expect they will address some of our gap areas, and a “CONTINUE” list, things that we have nailed, and should carry on with
We have overcome some challenges and tackled them along the way, next time we will sail through the same hurdles way better
We will have faced some challenges that we did not tackle very well, we will know to work around them next time
We have done a bunch of research, that knowledge is not going anywhere, it’s ours to keep, enrich and use as and when we like
We have built soft skills along the way, be it discipline, leadership, confidence, perseverance, organizational skills, presentation skills or communication skills…. again all ours to keep
We migt have built a network, a team, found a mentor, buddies, formed some relationships, we can have them for life.
We may have learnt some new technical skills, we could not have attempted to carry out a goal, and learnt nothing new during the course of it
We have now earned the reputation of being a doer that we can wear with pride
We now have a vengeance backing our next goal, we have the discomfort we need to stretch ourselves and grow, depending on our goal, we may have to become more creative, more economical, more organized, better leader, faster, more strategic, and so on

So maybe the hole we set out to fill in the first place did not get filled, BUT many other holes we did not see before got filled in the process. Overall, we have developed resilience, agility, wisdom, strength and put ourselves in a far better place to take on our next goal.

You might disagree, you may be left broken, frustrated, disheartened, unwilling to take on anything more, If so, consider these remedies:
What if you are financially broke?
You can start as small as you like, tax your brain to find the most optimum use of your resources and your network. There are a lot of free resources around if you look. If you feel it is out of your league, listen to what Dale Carnegie has to say about his little project which turned into a timeless book
“I prepared a short talk. I called it ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People.’ I say ‘short.’ It was short in the beginning, but it soon expanded to a lecture that consumed one hour and thirty minutes.”

What if you are tired, and it is just easier to do nothing?
Take a break and re-energize. Here are some ways that typically help, do whatever works for you.
Watch comedy

What if you are demotivated?
What’s to lose?
If you do nothing, the “failure” will in fact be a “loss”, instead pick yourself up and keep going, you can then make it a stepping stone to eventual success.
Thomas Edison’s teachers said he was “too stupid to learn anything.” He was fired from his first two jobs for being “non-productive.” As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

What if people around you are demotivated?
In that case, this could be your opportunity in life to build on leadership skills, you will need it sooner or later. See these for inspiration
As Steve Jobs once said during a famous commencement speech, “You have to trust in something. Your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path.

What if you just don’t have lady luck working for you?
What can you do, luck , by definition, is not something you can control. So stop depending on it!
Instead, make friends with its lesser cousin “calculated risk”. To move the needle, you have to make a big bets—but never rash—always based on a careful study of the outcomes. You have to know what you have to gain, and if you can afford to take the hit if it doesn’t go your way.
Gates, like many successful entrepreneurs before him, took an educated risk. After seeing the release of new computer processors, he knew that there was opportunity for him and his partner, Paul Allen, to start a business based on his passion for computers. Mr. Gates would also take another big risk with the decision to drop out of Harvard University to chase his dreams and of course many other times throughout Microsoft’s long journey.

What if you are afraid to fail again?
It’s a possibility, but then Fail is the new Win, remember, do it fast, get on with it.

What if you are afraid of what people say about you?
“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. “
Theodore Roosevelt

Enough said !

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