How To Become Bitter and Resentful in 9 Easy Steps

By Andrei Brumusila

March 12, 2019   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

becoming bitter

There are all sorts of benefits to being bitter and resentful. There’s getting rid of the people around you, ruining the things that are going well for you, and causing general self-sabotage.

Getting to that state of ruin doesn’t take that much, really. You just need to get the ball rolling and let it grow as it goes downhill.

Let’s look at some of the ways you can get the ball rolling and how to keep the momentum towards becoming bitter.

Suppress your feelings and say nothing

suppress feelings

Chances are that lots of people around you — including but not limited to parents, friends, boss, and coworkers — have some interest in telling you what to do. Sometimes, it’s to the point of abuse.

Parents might want you to go to a certain college or to follow a certain career to have something to brag about to their friends.

Your boss might see you as a slave that he owns and works you to insanity. Co-workers might want to get you to do their job for them.

And so on…

What you need to do is simply do as they ask you and never protest or stand up for yourself.

You might have your own ideas about what paths you want to follow or consider yourself a human and not a machine.

You might have your own interests and issues.

Don’t let those ideas fool you.

Always, unquestionably, prioritize what others ask of you and forget about yourself.

This simple trick alone, done long enough, will almost guarantee you’ll start hating everything and everyone including yourself.

Avoid making any changes

Creative people tend to be more embracing of change than others, so if you are this type of person, be very careful of your doings.

We all fear change on some level. The bigger the change, the bigger the potential impact and the bigger the fear.

Let that fear take over because it knows what it’s doing.

It’s telling you that you are about to do things you are not really familiar with. This could only mean two outcomes — better or worse.

There is really no middle since even if the conditions are the same you still put some effort into the change itself so you lost a bit.

On the other hand, being in a sticky situation with something you’re familiar with still enables you to get around it because you know the ropes.

And it’s not that bad anyway, it could be a lot worse.

Remain in whatever nasty situation you find yourself in and avoid opportunities to get out if they come your way.

Let all the bad feelings accumulate over time and the cherry on top will be there when you start regretting not doing a change when the opportunity arose.

We tend to regret the things we don’t do more than the ones we do so this should give a nice boost to your results.

Spend more time with successfully bitter people

successfully bitter people

Like with anything in life, a good mentor will help keep you on track and will accelerate the path to success.

Make sure you surround yourself with resentful people that complain about everything a lot and do nothing much else.

Occasionally, you might start having ideas of following your own interests, passions, or simply making changes that would lead to a more enjoyable life.

Of course, that is not what we want here so talking to these people will most likely result in them opening your eyes as to why those are bad ideas.

Going to the gym? Why bother?

You were always fat and you’ll just put it back on.

Imagine how the people at the gym are going to look at you.

Why work on something outside work or learn anything?

You don’t know how to have fun.

You could have “fun” drinking the rest of the weekend away. If you are lucky, you’ll get to lose some possessions or even sleep on the side of the road while attempting to go back home.

All the jobs suck, all bosses and co-workers are the same.

All jobs pay poorly so why bother trying to follow a career? Why bother changing your career?

Going to the doctor? Why?

They only want your money anyway and don’t know what they’re doing. Just look at this forum I found the internet and you’ll figure out your issue on your own.

You get the point.

These people are quite effective since their arguments linger in the back of your head anyway.

Without them, you might ignore those fears and actually do what you want to do or what needs to be done.

Blame yourself for things you don’t control

You know, some things we can do something about. Others, not so much.

If you fail to keep yourself restrained and you work on your mistakes, your attitude, your career, and family, don’t panic, there is still hope.

There are lots of things most of us can’t control — parents’ divorce, the death of a loved one, aunt’s illness, various kinds of accidents and so on.

Find something that is bothering you that you don’t have control over and just blame yourself for it.

You’re probably doing it in some shape or form anyway so just keep at it.

And so you’re not deserving of any good in your life with all of those things on your hands. There is no point in even trying.

Admittedly, this one may be a bit more subtle but don’t let that fool you.

It can drain you quite a bit and make you simply quit any desire for a happy life. You don’t deserve it now, do you?

Just let yourself sink in the darkness.

Ignore mistakes — you never make them anyway

Some weirdos take the time, occasionally, to take a hard look at themselves and see where they make mistakes.

It’s not easy and takes quite a lot of emotional energy sometimes.

And that is just the first step, then they go further and go against their instincts to try and fix those mistakes.

Fixing mistakes can lead to avoiding bad situations from happening repeatedly, people having more trust in them and likely a general improvement in their general quality of life.

It might even save careers or marriages.

Of course, you don’t make any mistakes, ever, so you can just forget about it.

But in the case that you start believing you might have made a mistake, just don’t do anything as nothing happened.

Chances are you are just tired. Rest a bit and it will all be gone the next day.

Forget about the things you’ve done right

Memories play an important part in our self-image. They consolidate how we see ourselves.

While some people will keep any kind of success or perceived success in mind for decades, others tend to quickly move to the next challenge.

The main idea is to just forget about your wins and if possible, focus on your failures.

This way you’ll reinforce your idea that you are a failure and you shouldn’t even try new things.

Focusing on your wins and taking a moment to let them sink in might give you a small boost of confidence that will help you win your next challenge.

This phenomenon is called a feedback loop and you want to make sure you keep yours in the negative.

The more you see yourself as a failure, the more you’ll fail and now become even more of a failure and so on.

Ignore the monsters under your bed

Usually, when you encounter a problem you try to solve it. I would argue that for most of us, life is just a series of problem-solving scenarios on some level.

Of course, the sooner you solve a problem, the better, at least in most cases.

Some problems are simpler to solve and more obvious while others are more subtle.

We, humans, have the capability of seeing into the future without much magic.

We can see if a current problem can have an impact on our future.

Most likely the ones with the most impact are also the most difficult to solve. They might require time and effort.

The proper course of action is to just pretend they are not there. Puff…gone.

Of course, they are not actually gone so while they linger in the back of your mind they keep stressing you out, affecting other aspects of your life as well.

Not only that but once the whole thing blows up, your dark side will start rising to the surface even more. Glorious!

Envy the results and ignore the effort

Everybody admires and hopes to be like someone.

Naturally, among those people, there will be some that we admire for their success.

But that is the wrong attitude, you don’t want to admire people and aspire to be like them.

What you need to do is envy their success in the sense that they were just lucky and simply got there out of nowhere.

And it’s partly their fault you don’t have the same success.

Nature also treats you badly and doesn’t allow you to be in a similar position. It has nothing to do with you.

The effort, sacrifices and continuous hard work that might have contributed to someone’s success are just fantasies for good movies. You live in the real world.

Everybody knows the world doesn’t work that way.

Plus, the world is corrupt as hell so they are surely some evil people that got there by some unorthodox means.

Of course, you are not like that, you try to be a good person so there is no hope of success for you.

All the more reason to hate the world.

Forget about your journey and just look at what others are doing

You don’t have a life to live for yourself so don’t waste much time and energy on that.

Instead, you can simply just look at what others are doing and comment on that with your friends or online.

Be sure to capture all the important details, like how much money they spend and related gossip like who they date, their outside marriage affairs, where they party, what brands they promote and all that.

And if they sell overpriced products that are already on the market, be sure to buy them despite the extra cost to help maintain their lifestyle while you barely make ends meet.

Follow them on social media and if they get into arguments online be sure to be on their side.

It doesn’t matter who is right, just fight with people.

The more you focus on other people the more you ignore yourself and what matters to you.

It may not look like much at first but, you can rest assured that it will lead to lots of misery down the line.

In conclusion

By this point, if you’ve done at least some of the steps described above, you should be on your path to becoming bitter.

You will be properly unpleasant to be around and repel people like opposing magnets.

Just keep at it and eventually, you’ll get in a dark, dark place where light doesn’t dare come.

Andrei Brumusila

Always on a quest for self improvement, learning and making life better step by step. I also created a private journaling app that makes it easy for non-writers to get into the habit of keeping a journal.

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