8 Types of Toxic Friends That Are Holding Your Happiness Hostage

By Mike Sherman

July 6, 2015   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

“We would do ourselves a tremendous favor by letting go of the people who poison our spirit.”
–Steve Maraboli


Toxic people are no good for our souls, spirit, and even our physical being. If you have any friends that seem to suck the life out of you, it’s a high possibility that they could be! While some people may view you as ruthless for kicking certain friends to the curb, keep in mind that you are doing this for your happiness. Anyone who is sabotaging your happiness, intentionally or not, should not be in your life. You must have more respect for yourself and know ultimately what is best for you. Your true friends are the ones who are supportive and uplift you, they never bring you down and keep you down.

If you are unsure about whether or not you have toxic friends, you must assess how you feel when it comes to certain people in your circle. Also, this article will detail some of the toxic friends you need to get rid of ASAP.

• The naysayer. Being honest and truthful is great, but if you are dealing with a person who constantly tells you that you won’t be able to achieve your dreams, you’re dealing with a naysayer. It is great to have a friend who will tell you honestly if the road you’re taking is ideal but if they are constantly putting down your goals and visions with no good reason then it’s highly likely this friend is jealous of you and doesn’t want you to succeed.

• The friend who uses you. Have a friend who only texts or calls when they need something? Do you feel you value them or than they value you? To be honest, we all use one another to some point and that’s fine as long as we appreciate the value the relationship brings. If your friend is nowhere to found when you need her or if you feel she doesn’t improve your well-being at all, then this person really has no place in your life.

• The person who disrespects you. Have a friend who is late all the time? Or perhaps he blows you off and makes up a lame excuse about it later. Time is a valuable asset and something you can’t get back. When someone disrespects you and doesn’t give you the same courtesy in return you don’t need that in your life. Sure your friend can be a blast to hang out with, but is he worth the headache or the lack of respect?

• The backstabber. No one needs this type of person in their life. If you are trying to be more positive a backstabbing friend can be lethal and poisonous for you. Not only are they lethal, they’re scummy. Anyone who has any respect for themselves or for their friend would not insult or speak ill of you behind your back. Besides being a damper on your positivity, friends like this can ruin your reputation or be harmful to your other relationships. Sack them and be better off without them.

• The friend who holds you back. As we progress down our life journey, we change. Sometimes the friends we made in the past do not change with us. It doesn’t mean they are bad people but they can be toxic for your own person happiness. You don’t want to someone who holds you back and does not push you to pursue your goals or dreams. Sometimes it comes down to compatibility. If you both are at different spectrums it is probably time to close this chapter and move on.

• The complainer. Everyone has a bad day, even the most positive people will stumble upon a bad day. However if you have a friend who is constantly complaining about life and not doing anything about it, it can dampen your mood and spirits. There are many people in life who only know how to play the blame game. Instead of owning their life and working to change it, they rather blame everyone else or other factors as to why their life isn’t going as planned. How can you progress in your life goals if you constantly have someone complaining about theirs? Eventually they may even blame you for their mishaps.

• The nitpicker. Again, honesty is great, but if someone is constantly criticizing your life, appearance, or any other aspect of your life, it isn’t a good sign. There is a difference between constructive criticism and hyper criticism. You’ll be able to tell which type of person your friend is by their conversation and how they handle others. This type of friend is not only critical of you, he’s critical of those around him and constantly judging others. Judgmental people have no place in a positive person’s life.

• The liar. You can never be happy with a friend who lies to you. Constant lying can damage your friendship until it’s irreparable. You don’t want someone who manipulates your feelings through lies and deceit. It’s better to be alone than to deal with someone this toxic.

It’s always hard to get rid of friends but sometimes you need to do it to lead a happier life. Anyone who is holding you back, hurting you, or disrespecting you should have no place in your life. You already have enough on your plate working on leading a positive and happy life and you should surround yourself with people who are not only supportive, but who are working towards the same goal. Jim Rohn once said “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

Mike Sherman

Author of "Maximize Your Day" and creator of personalgrowthandsuccess.com. I strive to improve my life and help others to do the same.

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