How Do Guys Flirt? (24 Signs He’s Flirting And How to Deal With It)

By Ruth Jesse

January 10, 2024   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

how men flirt

Flirting is a way of showing interest in someone. It can be playful, seductive, or just friendly. Sometimes it’s hard to tell whether or not the guys tend to flirter with you.

A lot of people often mistake being a best friend for being flirtatious. There are several reasons why men flirt with you, and sometimes it can be not easy to find out for sure if they’re into you.

In this blog post, we’ll explore some common signs that let you know if a guy is flirting, what to do if he is, and how to tell the difference between friendly attention from a cute guy and something more. We all want to feel attractive and wanted on this planet.

But there’s nothing worse than not knowing if someone likes you back. So read on for the top 24 subtle signs that he’s flirting with you and tips for dealing with it!

❣️ Here are the 24 Signs He’s Flirting and How to Deal With It ❣️

1. He goes out of his way to be with you

If the guy flirts with you, he’ll show you that he cares by putting in extra effort to be with you. If he wants to spend a whole day with you or shows that he cares about your day by noticing what you’re wearing or how you were treated by someone else, then he’s probably a bit more forward than just being a good friend. He’s looking at you a lot.

If you’ve ever felt like a celebrity or gazed into the eyes of your crush like he’s the only person in the world to you, then he may be flirting. When someone is looking at you and thinking about you, it could just be that you catch his eye, or maybe he’s actually into you.

2. He speaks to you differently than he speaks to your friends

Some guys can be shy and nervous around people they don’t know well. They may get tongue-tied around women and feel like they have to come off as sexy and flirty because that’s exactly what women want.

Other guys can become this way with you. Men typically try to impress women and demonstrate how good they are with other women in one of three ways.

They compliment you, flatter you, or come on strong with their way of showing they’re interested. He’s complimenting you by saying nice things, like how beautiful you are, how smart you are, etc. He’s flirting by putting on a show with his words.

He’ll talk about how the two of you will be the perfect couple, how he can’t wait to kiss you and be with you, etc.

3. He puts himself in your sight.

The Conversation Starts by Telling You Something Funny. If a guy isn’t paying attention to you, it’s because he’s distracted by something. If he’s looking at you, it means he’s thinking about you.

He’s giving you direct eye contact and body language that says he’s interested in what you have to say.

He likes your company. This is the most reliable, sure sign that he’s flirting.

It’s not only an easy way to tell if he’s into you and you may need a sixth sense, but it also has the bonus of making the conversation way less awkward.

Image credit: unsplash.com
Photo credit: unsplash.com

4. He seems easily embarrassed around you.

If he’s nervous around you and pays attention to how you’re interacting, he might be flirting with you. Ask if you can help with a task or offer some advice. The more supportive you are, the more he will trust you.

If he seems nervous around you, there’s a chance he’s just shy or unsure of how to approach you. You might even want to let him know that you like him, but you’re unsure how to start a conversation.

Maybe he’ll feel better knowing that you have his back and are willing to help him get over his nerves.

5. He mimics your gestures

One of the quickest telltale signs that a guy is flirting with you is if he starts mimicking your actions and facial expressions. For example, if you play with your hair or fingers, he might start doing the same thing.

Or if you start giggling, he might also start laughing. You can generally tell if a guy is flirting by seeing if he makes you feel included and wanted. If so, you can probably expect to hear from him in the future.

6. You make him smile

Do you have that attractive person who always puts a smile on your face? Chances are, this person is attractive, which means they can be a potential fling!

What does the smile mean? We often think that a smile is a major sign of sincerity, but not always. A smile often indicates that you’re testing his intentions.

For example, if he smiles, he’s probably not kidding around. He could be just being friendly or even thinking about doing something more.

The key is to notice when he smiles and how he looks when he does it. Flirting, like so many things in life, is a series of trials and errors.

7. He asks a lot of questions.

The number one obvious sign that the guy likes flirting with you is when he asks questions. He has a genuine interest in you.

But more than that, he’s not just asking questions in an attempt to get information about you. He’s asking questions that show genuine interest.

He’s asking questions about your day, about what you’re reading, or about your favorite meal. He’s asking questions that show he’s concerned about you.

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8. He’s going out of his way to get your attention and impress you.

Guys are going out of their way to be a little extra nice and impress you.

For example, he might remember your birthday or pay for a round of drinks in a bar because you told him you were thirsty. He might be trying extra hard to be a gentleman.

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9. He’s full of compliments.

What’s the best way to turn someone on? Intense compliments or subtle digs? Intense compliments leave you feeling giddy and loved, and intense compliments leave you feeling way too hot.

Either way, compliments are hot. If you feel like your man is full of them, keep responding to them. Keep the compliments coming. Buy The Modern Love Podcast!

10. It’s like he’s stalking you (but not in a hurry).

If you are out in public and you feel like a guy is looking directly at you while maintaining eye contact, looking for a reason to get your attention, then it is completely obvious he’s flirting with you. You can’t always see it, but he is around every corner.

11. He’s looking for compliments from you.

Men love receiving compliments. They love telling others about things that they like about themselves.

You can get a good sense of how interested a guy is in you by seeing how often he’s looking for compliments from you. Flirting with someone often means offering him a compliment.

If you catch him on the rebound after a serious breakup and he starts complimenting you on how much better her hair looks and that you like her shirt, you can tell that he is flirting with you.

This tip is especially useful if you’re unsure whether he’s flirting or just being a gentleman.

12. He finds excuses to touch you.

Everyone appreciates a touch. It can make you feel safe, secure, and respected. It can make you feel attractive, cherished, and valued. So if he is constantly touching you, it could be a major sign that he likes you.

Some of the common reasons for making him touch you, especially in public: Feeling like touching to checking that you’re safe.

13. Bring your fake boyfriend into the conversation

You are having a conversation with a guy you’re kind of into. You’re trying to get to know him better, and he goes out of his way to talk about his girlfriend or his family.

Maybe he’s jealous and doesn’t want to give up the attention.

Even if he’s not, it can make you feel awkward and end the conversation right there. This guy is flirting with you. He’s probably just a friend with benefits, but if you have a fake boyfriend, he can still flirt with you, so just play along.

If it’s a serious relationship, he’s probably going to get jealous, and then you’ll have a serious problem on your hands.

14. He teases you

This could mean anything, but if he teases you in a flirtatious way, he’s flirting with you. Some men flirt with you by calling your name and saying something silly.

Other men flirt with you by sending you something that could be innocent but is still a little bit flirtatious. Flirting is fun. If you have to ask, ask someone else.

15. He treats you in a special way

If you’re together with him, your partner will often do special little things to show you he appreciates you. It could be small – like holding your hand or putting his arm around you.

Or it could be something bigger – like buying you a present, giving you a full complement, or even surprising you with a romantic date.

You can often tell how he feels about you based on the shared moments and little things he does. Some guys won’t show this kind of attention in a serious relationship.

However, if he’s flirting with you, he’s showing you he’s taken by you.

16. He tries to impress you.

There’s a difference between being nice and trying to impress someone. If he has done something nice for you, and he’s making it extra clear that you’re more than just a friend.

By doing things like inviting you to do things like spend moments together, it might be because he’s trying to get in your pants.

But if he’s just nice, it might be because he does have your best interests at heart, and he wants to spend more time with you.

Try not to take it too seriously because you’re probably way too blinded by how much you like this guy to take things too seriously. Just be nice and try not to read too much into everything.

17. The way he looks at you

How do you know he likes you? Maybe it’s the way he looks at you, but what exactly does he look like when looking at you? There are several ways to know that someone is flirting with you.

Here are a few of them: When he looks at you when you walk by him: It’s easy for a guy to be friends with you when you walk by him, or he is busy talking to you, but it’s much harder to be friendly with you when he is staring at you.

18. The way he talks to you

If you find yourself talking to a guy in a friendly way, you might feel a bit weird because you’re not interested in him romantically. However, if he talks to you like he’s flirting with you, you might be intrigued.

If you’re interested in him, you’ll talk back. Just listen and observe. If you are into him, you’ll be excited. He’ll feel the same way. You’ll probably talk a lot too.

19. Where he touches you

When he touches your arm, hand, or back, it could be innocent, or you could get worried. If you are uncomfortable with his touch or something is wrong with it, it’s okay to tell him.

Where he touches you
Photo credit: unsplash.com

20.  He’s always sending you dirty messages on Tinder.

Guys will often send you dirty messages on Tinder or other dating apps. Some of these are funny, and others can be hurtful.

If a guy texts you a string of sexual messages, especially if they are innuendo, make sure you are having a good time and that you know what he is talking about.

If you know what he’s talking about, but you don’t know what he is talking about, you can either make fun of it or try and educate him about the appropriate date topics you’re talking about.

21. His posture towards you

The most obvious way to determine if he’s flirting with you or not is to take a look at the way he’s standing towards you. He’ll either appear confident, polite, and warm, or cold, distant, and aloof. His posture says a lot about him.

If his posture says he’s happy to see you and actively wants to spend time with you, he’s flirting with you. If his posture says he’s acting distant and aloof and wants nothing to do with you, he’s flirting with you.

22. He brings up a topic you two have never talked about before.

He’ll try and make conversation, and he’ll ask you something you’ve never talked about before. Or maybe you two have something in common, and he’ll make a point of mentioning it.

Image credit: unsplash.com
Photo credit: unsplash.com

23. His body language towards you

When you notice his body language (and his body language reflects your own), your intuition will automatically kick in to let you know if he’s flirting with you.

Sometimes his body language will have some subtle messages, but when his body language mirrors yours (even if you can’t put your finger on it), then he’s flirting.

What if you can’t tell if he’s flirting with you? You have a few options. You could ask him if he likes you and see how he reacts. If he doesn’t seem to be flirting with you, you can move on.

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24. What was the last thing he said to you?

This is a great opener to get a guy to say a compliment, a question, or even a statement. But the last thing he said before he hung up is also a great way to flirt.

You can also use this to flirt with girls you know. Say something like, “I wish my man were as caring as you.”

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😁Ways on how to deal with a man flirting with you 😁

➣ Make the right choice

➣ Be honest and clear about your intentions.

➣ Reciprocate his feelings

➣ Let your feelings go

➣ Resist the urge to respond

➣ Sole focus your attention elsewhere

➣ Mention his wife

➣ Do not seek validation

➣ Manage your expectations

➣ Expand your circle

➣ Confidence test

➣ Look for his flaws

➣ Be objective

➣ Talk about it

➣ Get to know his friends

➣ Stand your ground

➣ Be on the lookout

➣ Consider why you’re in a relationship with him.

♥ Ways to Flirt With Your Crush ♥

➫ Smile with a subtle smile as you walk

➫ Stare at them in a not-creepy way

➫ Text Your Crush the right amount

➫ Find your common interests

➫ Don’t answer every question

➫ Let your crush catch you staring

➫ Leave your crush wanting more by keeping conversations short

➫ Remember what your crush tells you

➫ Spend more time with your friends

➫ Pretend you didn’t hear your crush

➫ Drop something in front of your crush

➫ Invite your crush to group things

➫ Flirt with your body language, not your words

➫ Give specific compliments

➫ Flirt with playful teasing

➫ Draw attention to your lips

☀ Flirting Tips for Guys (from a Woman) ☀

✏ Sweetness and Light

✏ Listen and respond

✏ Get comfortable

✏ Take it with you

✏ A little play

✏ Stop caring so much

✏ First impressions

✏ Strong eye contact

✏ Power of Purse

✏ The Pygmalion Effect

✏ The art of subtle touch

✏ The eyebrow flash

📱 Right Way to Flirt on the Phone 📱

📞 Optimize the number exchange

📞 Say sweet things to her

📞 Start a text conversation with a girl

📞 Compliment her

📞 Know what to text a girl you’re flirting with over text

⚜️ Is he flirting or just being nice? ⚜️

When a guy wants to be friends with you, he might want to be your friend. He might want to be your friend, but he also might want to date you. You may think his friendship is a form of flirting, but not everyone thinks that.

Other signs include: touching you. Whether it’s a hug, eye contact, eyebrow flash, pat on the back, or a touch on the arm, if you get the sense that a guy is flirting with you, he’ll often either do the above-mentioned or touch you on the arm or shoulder or elbow or put his arm around you when talking. He’ll often place his hand on your knee.

This is a telltale sign that he wants to be close to you and that he might want more than friendship. He’ll often make small talk with you and is interested in what you have to say.

Is he flirting or just being nice?
Photo credit: unsplash.com

🤓 Conclusions 🤓

The next time you’re hanging out with him, and there are other women around, observe the way he talks to them and treats them.

If he’s flirty with all of the ladies, then he may just be a flirtatious person who is naturally charming, charismatic, and women-tended.

Don’t put too much stock into how he treats you on the job and see how he feels about you when he’s off the clock. See if being flirty is just part of his job, and if he likes you, he may not flirt during work.

🤔 Relevant Questions 🤔

Q: How do you tell if a guy finds you attractive?

A: If a guy is genuinely interested in you, he will try to get to know you better. He will talk to you, pay attention to you, and try to get your attention. He will approach you in social settings and show a certain amount of physical attraction.

He might also call you names or try to embarrass you in front of friends if he’s not totally into you. Flirting is a form of showing interest in someone else. So, if he’s flirting with you, he likes you. His language changes.

If he starts saying stuff like, “Hey Baby,” he might just be joking around. But if he starts using a lot of more serious or “cheesy” words to talk to you, that’s when you should pay attention. Is he talking about what you have in common with his friends? Is he commenting on your body? These are questions worth answering.

Q: Do you flirt without knowing?

A: There’s a good chance you do. Most men can have fun showing interest without ever really crossing the line into wanting to date you.

They may just be interested in having a fun conversation or a good laugh. Most of the time, they don’t know what they are getting into. How do I know if he’s flirting with me?

Of course, he may not be flirting with you right now, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t into you. He may not be flirting at all.

Either way, if you are unsure about whether or not someone is flirting with you, ask. Ask whether they’re playing with you or whether or not you’re flirting back. You can do this as honestly and politely as possible. Don’t push it or get in the way of his flirtation.

Q: What is the unspoken attraction?

A: Unspoken attraction is the type of attraction that cannot be expressed with words. It is communicated through body language, eye contact, gestures, facial expressions, and tone of voice.

The thing with unspoken attraction is that it’s difficult to understand if the other person has feelings for you or not.

You can’t know what they are thinking or feeling by looking at them. This is why people often find it hard to tell if they are into someone else or not.

If there is an unspoken attraction between two people, then one person usually feels nervous around the other, which causes them to act in a certain way because they don’t want to seem weird in front of them.

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Ruth Jesse

Ruth is a life coach who specialises in relationships and career development. Outside work, she loves writing novels and guides for personal development.

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