How To Trigger Man’s Hero Instinct (15 Amazing Ways)

By Ruth Jesse

January 10, 2024   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

Do you want your man to fall in love with you? If so, it’s time to trigger his hero instinct to boost his confidence and make him love you all over again by doing this to him. Stop fearing to play the damsel in distress and win his heart by triggering the hero instinct of your man. Here, you won’t only learn about what it is but also find the amazing ways to trigger the hero instinct of a man. So, let’s start!

Photo credit: Pexels.com

๐Ÿฆธโ€โ™‚๏ธ What is Hero Instinct ๐Ÿฆธโ€โ™‚๏ธ

For many of you, the term “Hero Instinct” would be new but in relationship psychology, it is a very important one. Just like we see so many heroes on the screen and idealize them, every man wants to be a hero.

He wants to be the hero of his life. He wants to be a hero for the people he loves. Similarly, he wants to be treated like a hero and needs assurance from his partner that is he a real hero.

So, the hero instinct describes the most fundamental biological drive/urge of a man to be felt as valued, needed, and desired.

Your man won’t say it to you, never! But every man has a strong urge to be a hero. Don’t think that your man will ask for his help in this because he won’t.

However, you have to understand and realize the intensity of this instinct in a man and help him in this journey.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

๐Ÿ•ด๏ธ James Bauer’s secret obsession ๐Ÿ•ด๏ธ

You will see many advice, tips, and suggestions on triggering the hero instinct in your man. However, you must read the book of James Bauer on this topic, titled “His Secret Obsession”.

James Bauer was the one who coined the term, the hero instinct. In this book, he has very well explained everything for triggering his hero instinct that you must know.

Being a relationship psychologist, he has shared the most effective relationship advice in this book to activate romantic relationships.

If you feel that your everyday life and relationship are so boring, you must read this book! It will help all men and women to enter into a happy relationship by knowing the simple truth about men.

Many have found the one they Love through these popular dating sites! Create an account with the one that best fits you Today! (Donโ€™t leave your love life for tomorrow)

WebsiteDating Site(s)Description
eharmonyeHarmonyA Trusted Online dating site for singles.
sugardaddieSugardaddieA dating site for attractive single women and successful men who have financial security and confidence.
Be2

be2 (Mobile)


be2 (Desktop)

be2 is one of the leading names in the online dating space with extreme brand recognition and a high quality user base of singles looking for that special someone. Promote through superb demographically targeted and themed landing pages.
C-date

C-Date (Mobile)


C-Date (Desktop)

C-Date is the leading casual dating site for those who beside their career want to live their passionate fantasies with someone who shares the same spirit. It is a fantastic and well-established casual dating offer, which works on both male and female audiences.
singles50

Singles50 (Mobile)


Singles50 (Desktop)

Singles50 is one of the world's leading dating agencies for single women and men over the age of 50. We help you find the right partner for a fulfilling, long-term relationship. Our objective is to show that love can happen at any age!
Academic SinglesAcademic Singles (Mobile)

Academic Singles (Desktop)

Academic Singles is one of the leading platforms for singles with higher education in the search for love. We are specialized in connecting single men and women, taking their affinity into account. Our objective is to help you find your perfect match!

๐Ÿคต How to trigger your man’s hero instinct ๐Ÿคต

To trigger his hero instinct, you would have to make a little effort that will make your man fall in love with you again! So, here are the following ways that will help in triggering his hero instinct!

1. Show your appreciation

It is very important to appreciate your man on many things to trigger his hero instinct. A man falls in true love with a woman who makes him feel appreciated.

All men want appreciation from their women. This appreciation can be in the form of love phrases, appreciation dialogues, and just a simple sweet conversation.

Whatever you do, make sure it appreciates the guy who makes your life beautiful. In doing so, try to be realistic as well because you shouldn’t mislead a person.

For example, if you think that he is doing something wrong, don’t appreciate him on it to make it a hero. While triggering his hero instinct, make sure you positively support him to be a better person.

Appreciate him on things that are constructive and help your relationship grow.

Whenever you see that he is doing something wrong, don’t either start criticizing him or engage in a fight. Rather, talk politely and in a genuine tone that makes him understand the critique.

2. Ask for his help but don’t go overboard

One of the ways to trigger the hero instinct of men is to ask for their help. You can easily trigger a man’s hero instinct if he is in a relationship with you.

the most important thing to understand here is to maintain a balance. You should not do everything by yourself while letting him rest all the time when you work.

On the contrary, you should keep him on his toes while performing any task. Otherwise, he would start avoiding you due to being overburdened.

Instead, there is a need to assure a balance between the times when you call him for help or when you don’t.

Sometimes, ask him to help you out in an enjoyable activity, and don’t forget to be grateful to him for this. It will make him feel amazing about himself and he would start thinking positively about himself.

Not only this but such a situation would also help in triggering the hero instinct in him while improving your relationship.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

3. Thank him frequently but again, don’t go overboard

The same rule as above could be applied here. A woman must learn to thank his man for numerous things to make him feel like a hero.

The women who never thank their men for anything end up harming their relationships. The men may seem happy with them at the beginning of the relationship but they could not in the long run.

To win a long-term relationship with a guy of your choice, you would have to win his heart. The easiest way to do so is to thank him frequently to make him feel like a hero.

In return, he would start loving you so much because you would be the one who gave him this confidence.

However, don’t thank him all the time or for everything that he may start taking you for granted.

Thank him for positive and constructive things but not for the unnecessary stuff that produces no good to him.

4. Boost his confidence

A man is nothing if he doesn’t have any confidence in him. No woman would prefer to live her life with a man who has no confidence.

Everyone wants a guy who can walk with his head up and communicate by making direct eye contact. This is why the concept of triggering hero instinct in a man is so important.

One simple way to do so is to make your man feel fantastic about himself by encouraging him on everything.

Whatever he does, you must tell him that he has done an outstanding job and has inspired you so much. Never discourage him on anything because it will hurt his self-confidence.

Suppose that he has cooked a meal for you on a busy day. Instead of telling him that you are over-tired or not in a good mood, appreciate his efforts. Praise his cooking skills and pass some good remarks.

You could not believe how dramatically it brings a boost in his confidence and how his life gets better than before.

Man in Black Suit Achieved an Accomplishment
Photo credit: Pexels.com

5. Look for him around the house

Many men start to underestimate themselves because they feel like nobody needs them. All men need the attention, care, and time of a woman in their lives.

Therefore, make sure to look for him around the house whenever your man is at home. Try to complete all your household chores when he is on job, sleeping, or busy somewhere else.

However, you must give your full time and attention to him whenever he is around.

Look for him around your house and show him that he makes you happy and you love to spend time with him. Start some good conversation and enjoy each other’s company.

According to the hero instinct concept in psychology, men loved it when people look around for them.

So, try out this tactic to boost his self-image in his mind and make him a hero in the actual world.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

6. Tell him that he makes you happy

It is crucial to tell him that he makes you happy. Whether he actually does or not, you must make him realize this if you want to bring the change in his life.

To make him think like this, say this thing repeatedly to him. Whenever he does something for you, tell him that it made you so happy.

For example, if he buys you a gift or takes you out on a long drive, don’t be shy to express your happiness.

Tell him that he is the reason behind your smile and he is a great person to spend time with. These things positively change a man’s perception of him.

Learn what men want you to know but will never tell you. CHECK THIS!

7. Make sure he knows you idealize him

It is not necessary if you seriously idealize him or want to create a better version, show him that he idealizes him.

To make sure he knows that you idealize him, show it with your words, body language, and behavior.

For example, you can sit on a couch in the same way as he does. While doing so, make sure that he notices you and feels happy. Don’t hesitate to tell him at the same time that you like his sitting style.

Similarly, ask him to go to a restaurant that he loves for lunch or dinner. Tell him that you idealize him and love his choices.

Not only this but you can also buy the dresses of his favorite colors to show him that he inspires you so much.

These types of conversations are mandatory to trigger a man’s hero instinct. They constructively change a man’s perception and makes him think that he is an inspiring personality.

8. Make him feel like a king

All of us love the kind stories that we have heard in our childhood. So, why not turn your man into a real-life king for you?

Yes, you can take this challenge easily for winning results.

You don’t need to learn the psychology of a man or relationships tactics to do so. Instead, you can do it simply by taking interest in his every task while appreciating him in several ways.

You may buy him flowers to make him feel appreciated upon meeting a certain goal. You may also pass love cards with romantic phrases to make your man feel like the king of your life.

Also, avoid arguing with him most of the time because no one argues with a king. Instead, everyone gives respect and full freedom to a king to do anything.

So, do the same with the king of your life because this is a fantastic way to make him think as if he is a real hero.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

9. Support him in meeting new challenges

According to available research in psychology, many women go through breakups in relationships because they don’t support their men.

Keep in mind that an unsupportive woman is the biggest hindrance in the way of a man’s success. If you are not supporting him, you would fail to make him think like a hero.

Those women who support their men help him go through the long run of success, fame, profits, and a long-lasting relationship.

Especially, if he is your spouse, you must help him whenever and wherever you can.

Whether he has some job-related challenges to meet up or something related to personal life, he must know that you are standing by his side.

This feeling won’t only give him more confidence but also act as a turning point in his life.

Low angle of successful female executive manager in classy style sitting at table with laptop in contemporary workplace and passing documents to colleague
Photo credit: Pexels.com

10. Protect him

To trigger the hero instinct in your partner, you must protect him.

Protecting someone doesn’t mean that you are over possessive about him or don’t trust him. Instead, it means that someone is so special to you that you can’t take risk of letting him go into any trouble.

It is the same thing as a mother protects her child and keep him like a flower.

It’s maybe surprising for you to know that a man is also like a baby who wants his partner to protect him. Through this, he feels more valued and needed that improves his self-perception in his mind.

11. Respect him

Ask yourself if you respect your man or not. If you don’t respect him, you can never trigger his hero instinct.

Bullying each other or insulting each other always leads to poor consequences in a happy relationship.

If you want to feel loved and valued, you must have to respect and love him as well.

No relationship can flourish without love and respect for each other. In contrast, respecting and supporting each other in a relationship gives people the courage to take every challenge with greater courage.

As a result, the victory becomes guaranteed and a man starts taking himself as a hero.

Therefore, make him free of all humiliating conversations and start giving him the respect that he deserves.

12. Say nice words or love phrases to him

Love advice, love phrases, or a conversation free of all negative elements directly impacts a man in a positive way.

When you say nice words to him and quote love phrases to him, it shows him that you care for him. It tells him that you love him the most and want to keep and protect him from all evils.

Such a feeling of love and care can do wonders to a man’s life and turn him into a real-life hero.

So what are you waiting for? If you are in love with someone and want to keep him with you forever, express your love to him. The women who do so, don’t only win that guy but also make him love themselves blindly.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

13. Make him feel useful

A man can never be your hero if he feels as if he is useless. There are many men who go through this and take a step back from everything productive.

If you feel that he is also considering himself as a useless person, it is your responsibility to change his perception of himself.

To do so, try to engage him in different things with you and realize him that he is very helpful. Tell him that it was not possible to accomplish without him and he is a fantastic person with amazing qualities.

When he does anything for you, don’t make him count the errors or faults. Instead, ignore the drawbacks and make him think amazingly about himself by appreciating him.

Through this, he would start taking him as a useful and valued person that could be the hero of this world.

Proven Dating Courses that works like a charm:

WebsiteDating Courses Description
the-tao-of-badass-logoThe Tao of Badass7 Simple scientific tricks to have any woman you want
TRDHow To Find The Man Of Your DreamsAttract the Man of Your Dreams -- and Receive a Marriage Proposal in 12 Months or Less
TCBANText ChemistryLearn a special kind of text message that you can send a man right now that will unlock a hidden, ravenous desire for you.
downloadThe Devotion SystemLearn how to avoid making these attraction-killing errors and reveal a powerful set of words I call a "Devotion Sequence" that make a man lust uncontrollably for you (even if he says he's not interested).

14. Make him free from self-complexes

Women play a great role in either taking a man out of his self-complexes or pushing him back into the complexes.

Now, it is your choice to decide what type of woman you want to be. Keep in mind that if you throw someone into self-complexes, your heart would never find peace. You would have to pay for it at some point in your lifetime.

Therefore, it is better to make him free from all self-complexes. It would not only make him grow but also give you inner peace.

In fact, it would benefit both of you positively and help your relationship grow constructively.

A tip to remember here is that whenever he speaks about any of his complexes, say positive words and don’t discourage him further. Learn more HERE!

Instead, help him find out the ways to overcome those complexes and make a better version of himself. Through these efforts, you can successfully help him fulfill his biological drive of hero instinct and be his own hero.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

15. Pay attention to his every point/word

In every successful relationship, it is crucial that you must pay attention to what the other person is saying to you.

If you are not paying attention to his words and things, he would leave you alone one day. You can’t keep a man with you in the long run if you ignore him in any way.

It is an ultimate truth that men love to be in the company where they get the most attention. Therefore, you must try this way to win his heart and develop his confidence in himself.

As a result, it would lead to triggering his hero instinct that would benefit both of you.

For example, you should stop looking at your mobile when he is talking to you. This is because it would show him that you are not ignoring him but leaving your own tasks to listen to him attentively. It would make him consider himself a hero while boosting your love in his heart.

๐Ÿ”” Do men like feeling a hero? ๐Ÿ””

It may sound strange to many of you but yes, a man like feeling like a hero. Regardless of how does he looks, he would love to feel like a hero.

Men need appreciation from others that give them internal peace and real happiness. Every guy loves to be desired and wanted by others.

When you see that your man is low on confidence or underestimates himself, you should trigger his hero instinct.

At the end of the day, you would see that your man is a different person due to the confidence that you trigger in him. When you make your man feel like a hero, he would not only become a better person but a better partner too.

Therefore, if you want to develop long term relationship with a man, make sure to make him feel good and trigger his hero instinct.

โน Is it easier to trigger the hero instinct in your man? โน

There is no single answer to this question because it varies from person to person. There are men who are easy to change but others take time.

However, you could get 100% results for developing hero instinct in a man if you follow the right ways. The ways discussed would enable you to enjoy the realistic results for triggering her instinct in your man.

Pay attention to everything that relates to him and make him feel appreciated in numerous ways.

If you still find it hard, make sure to look for a relationship coach. Discuss with him about the issues you are facing in triggering the hero instinct in your man.

A good relationship expert would give you realistic advice and help you in this journey.

However, you may also read books and articles on how to trigger the hero instinct and play the damsel in distress.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

โบ Conclusions โบ

There is no doubt that all men want to feel like a hero because they like it when others admire or idealize them.

In this journey, their women can play a significant role in making them feel good about themselves. By figuring out what a man wants, you can bring change in his life.

Follow the ways discussed in this article and try out multiple methods to trigger the hero instinct of your man. All of them would play an incredible role in boosting the self-confidence of your man.

When a male develops greater confidence and a positive self-image, it means that he is developing his hero instinct. Although it is not always easy to take your man to this point, keep in mind that nothing is impossible.

Therefore, if you want to make your man enjoying his hero instinct, take interest in bringing the change in him.

โ™ฅ๏ธ Frequently Asked Questions โ™ฅ๏ธ

Q: What is hero Bauer’s instinct?

A: Hero Bauer instinct is the hero instinct named by James Bauer. According to it, a man likes it when he feels valued and demanded by others. Every male wants to be like a hero and only a woman can make him meet this challenge. If you want to learn more about hero Bauer instinct, read this article from the start.

Q: Do guys like it when you initiate?

A: Surprisingly, all men like it when you initiate. Every guy feels great when a woman makes him feel great. For example, a woman can appreciate him on multiple things, say good words to him, and make him feel useful in several ways.

Q: How do I keep him wanting more?

A: If you want to keep him wanting more, you should put more effort into your relationship. All relationships get stronger when both men and women put their efforts into it.

To make him want more, you must take care of his needs and love him more as well. Make him realize that he is so special to you. Tell him that you can’t live without him and stop engaging in arguments. Don’t unnecessarily fight with him or avoid being rude.

Photo credit: Pexels.com

Last but not least, represent the best of yourself to him. Wear clean and tidy clothes and put on a nice perfume. Make a good hairstyle and put on some jewelry if he likes. Be a person in which he takes more interest, and see the magic within only a few days!

Do you want to get his full attention and make him more interested in you? Get more tips and trigger that hero instinct in him here. WATCH THIS VIDEO NOW!

Ruth Jesse

Ruth is a life coach who specialises in relationships and career development. Outside work, she loves writing novels and guides for personal development.

Other Dating Guide

Individual Reviews

Recommended Scam-Free Dating Sites

At DumbLittleMan.com, we have analyzed all dating sites to find the ones that have great features and safety measures in place to be as scam-free as possible. Check them out!

#1 Hookup website for over 20 years!ย Large member base. Free to try.