Love Bombing: 16 signs of a love bomber and what you can do about it

By Ruth Jesse

January 10, 2024   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

Have you ever heard about love bombers and know the signs of a love bomber? Love bombing is basically the offer of an instant and new relationship/companionship where the other person uses deceptive ploy accounting as friendly displays of affection. Before we go into details, let’s first learn what does it mean by love bombed. So, let’s start!

What is love bombing? For many of you, love bombing would be a new term but you might have suffered through it. Love-bombing is when a person uses the demonstrations of attention and affection in order to manipulate you or make you do something he wants. For many successful recruitment drives, becoming a love bombing partner is the most commonly used tactic.

💣 Here are the 16 signs of a love bomber and what you can do about love bombing 💣

1. Frequently says “I Love You”

The most common sign of a love bomber is that he frequently says I love you to his new partner whom he wants to manipulate. A true lover won’t need to say “I Love You” this often but his actions demonstrate his love for you. Instead, a person will use these words to assure his love to you that don’t even exist in actuality.

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2. He mistreats other people

When a person truly loves you, he also takes care of the feelings and emotions of other people. However, a love bombing person would have no concern for others’ feelings. He would also be kind and loving to you because he has some hidden motive behind this. When you will fulfill this motive, he would start mistreating you as well just like he does to other people.

3. Uses manipulative tactic

In love bombing, people frequently use manipulative tactics to get into a fake love relationship. First of all, they would behave as very caring, loving, and nice to manipulate you. Once you start trusting them and engage in a romantic relationship with them and do what they want, the narcissist typically switches and becomes very difficult.

4. You may feel weird with him at times

A feigning friendship is the one where love bombers tend to seem weird at times. You would notice that he behaves differently at times while he is absolutely normal at other times. These are the warning signs that something problematic is going on in his head that will soon ruin this so-called healthy relationship.

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5. He may give you unnecessarily excessive attention

In new relationships with early youth cults, they may give you unnecessarily excessive attention. You may have heard a related story or seen other cult members who pay greater attention to a girl/woman at the start but no concern at later. When you step into a new relationship and a love-bombed person starts to pay attention to you beyond bound, you must be alarmed.

6. He may offer instant companionship

In true and long-lasting friendships, the coordinated effort comes from both sides to flourish the relationship. However, unhealthy relationships usually include one person who offers instant companionship and wants to go deep quickly into the relationship. The best course of action in such a case is to control your emotions and go slow. Make sure you never rush into a deep companionship with a person to whom you don’t feel secure.

7. You notice him engage in excessive flattery and verbal seduction

A true lover would never use flattery or verbal seduction to get your attention or to come closer. However, flattery and verbal seduction are the most common tactics of love bombing. When a person wants to love to bomb you, he starts to praise you unnecessarily. He also

8. He unnecessarily pays more attention to you at your good times

Another clear-cut sign of a love bomber is that he would be with you mainly at your good times. When you are sad and feel low self-esteem in any matter, he would not be as concerned about it as he should. In contrast, a true lover would be with you on all your good and bad days. Therefore, when you see a person more inclined to you only when you are happy and not when you are sad, you must know that he is a love bomber.

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9. You would observe his unusual nonsexual touching

Furthermore, a love bombing person will show affection by his unusual nonsexual touching. For example, he can give you a soft kiss on the forehead, he can hold your hand in public, he can tap on your back, touch your hair, and more. These all gestures are his tools to win your heart. It is own you to identify the wrong intentions of a love bomber behind these non-sexual acts.

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10. He often found luring people in front of you

Love-bomb men will always praise people in front of you just to show their affection towards other people as well. This action represents that they wanted you to see how good they are. They will impress you by giving hands to the older people. They will tell other people that how blessed they are for having such a nice partner as you in life.

11. Expensive and extravagant gifts are grand gestures

When you are with a love bombing person, you will see him providing you with extravagant and expensive gifts. Even he will gift you on random occasions to show his generosity and affection towards the relationship. In the initial stages, you may find it attractive but this will end in control, weird behavior, false criticism, and more.

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12. Long romantic conversations about present and future

Love bombing person knows about the weaknesses of the other person. They will indulge you in present and future planning as being acting as a good partner. Remember, that a real relationship takes ample time to discuss future things. besides in a love bombing relationship, the person will start discussing moving in together, about marriage and children at the beginning of the relationship.

13. Makes you feel special

another sign that you are in relation to the love bomber is he always makes you feel special. He gives you special importance and shows interest in you. You may feel that you are in true love with them. In love bombing. the person can give you a flower bouquet more frequently, will arrange surprises for you, provide fancy gifts and more. In a sincere relationship, one does not need to announce all the time that they love you by spending money. Receiving gifts more frequently than you expect is a good sign that you are with a fake person who is just playing with your feelings and emotions.

14. Compliments you as a perfect partner

Everyone loves to be praised by friends and loved ones. Therefore, the love bomb will also use this tactic to show you how much they are in love with you. Beware, never miss the red flag. If you heard such comments like, “You are as beautiful as a princess,” “I love you to the moon and sky,” “I have never seen someone as attractive as you.” Do not let anyone play with your emotions as they seem like the best life partner.

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15. Frequently spend time with you

Do not do wrong with yourself and with your life by getting into a fake relationship, if someone is spending ample time with you and even misses work this is the red flag. In a progressive relationship, both partners do not get much time to entertain each other. However, in a love bombing scenario, you will see the other person always have time to spend with you. It feels attractive when you are an immature person but in practical life, it never works. His embedded name on your wallet, wrist, or somewhere else would hurt you so much when he will manipulate you and moved away.

16. Stays in constant contact with you

In love bombing, the person will show interest in you by staying in touch with you constantly. For example, he will make long calls, send text messages, contact you through email, Whatsapp, and any other means. In your tough times, they will show you support over calls and messages. Besides, they have their own motive behind this affection drama. Maybe you feel uncomfortable talking 24/7 to that love bombing person.

👣 Ways on what you can do about love bombing 👣

📌 Identify the red flags in your relationship with another person

Women have always the very strong gut feelings. Therefore, if you feel or see anything appropriate in a relationship never miss these red flags. If someone is contacting you too much without your consent, if you are receiving frequent gifts, if you are receiving a lot of compliments, do not ignore and fix the wrong.

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📌 Say no to emotional abuse/disrupted mental health due to love bombers

Love bombers are not used to hearing “No” in response. They will do good to you till you agree to whatever they demand and need. This is another sign that you are in a relationship with a love bomber. learn to say no to emotional and mental abuse. If you do not like someone’s behavior or they are getting too involved, give them a shut-up call. You can get more information about emotional abuse and mental health online.

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📌 Don’t make friends instantly but look up for healthy relationships

Remember not to make friends instantly and give yourself time to know about the person. Some people go crazy about having a relationship because of society or peer pressure. It leads to having a fake relationship that destroys your mental health. It’s okay to wait for the right person to start a healthy relationship.

📌 Seek help from support groups, a family member, or a close friend

If you are stuck with a love bombing partner, who is abusing you and blackmailing involve a family member. The soon you will get rid of this fake partner the soon life will become easy. Give them back all the expensive gifts and stuff you have, so your life will get back to normal. You can reach out to support groups, a close friend, siblings, or any trusted person to help you out. You may type the keyword “ways to deal with love-bombers” to get more information. Some websites paid commissions to users where users provide real-life stories that may help you.

📌 Seek a licensed therapist to get rid of love-bombed people

Another thing you can do about the love bombing is to seek the help of a licensed therapist. If you are living in New York, you can access professional and licensed therapists in New York City. You can tell the therapist about the love bomber partner so they can help you in better ways. They will ask about your mental trauma or emotional abuse to use the right strategy for the treatment and counseling.

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🧐 Conclusions 🧐

To stay protected from love bombers, it is crucial to know the signs of a love bomber as well as the tactics they use to manipulate you. Along with knowing these signs, it is also important to learn the ways of what you can do about love bombing. By keeping these signs and ways in mind, you can effectively deal with people anywhere without letting them manipulate you.

🤔 Relevant Questions 🤔

❓ What are love bombs examples?

You can identify the love bombers by their affection gestures, i.e, sending your gifts, flower bouquets, vacation tickets, trips, and more.

❓ What is narcissist love bombing?

Narcissist love bombing is when a person manipulates his love actions just to impress someone and gain sympathy. They present themselves as the best life partner. Their target is the newer members of society and they repeat the same content with them like flattering, affection, attention, and more.

❓ How long does love bombing usually last?

One cannot define a time period for how long the love-bombing will last. It depends on the ability of a person to predict the wrong in a relationship. Love bombing could be for a week, months, years, or several years. Sometimes people realize it very late that they are in a relationship with the wrong person.

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Ruth Jesse

Ruth is a life coach who specialises in relationships and career development. Outside work, she loves writing novels and guides for personal development.

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