5 Text Messages You Should Never Send

By Dr. Kurt Smith

September 2, 2016   •   Fact checked by Dumb Little Man

Have you seen the popular meme about not answering phone calls, because โ€œyou donโ€™t use your phone for thatโ€?

Apparently, more and moreย people are communicating via text messaging these days instead of initiatingย phone calls.ย While text messaging is fast, convenient, and easy, some conversations need to be face-to-face. There are situations where a text message can be misconstrued and cause more harm than intended.

Here are 5 text messages that will remind you of the proper text etiquette.

1. โ€œWe need to talkโ€

Receiving this text message can freak out your recipient. Our minds usually go to worst-case scenarios when we read statements like this. Depending on who you sent this message to, it can cause them a lot of unnecessary stress.

A girlfriend, for example, may think sheโ€™s getting dumped when she reads this text. An employee may think he'sย getting fired and a child may think he'sย in deep trouble.

If you want to give someone a heads up that you want to discuss something important later, choose your words wisely.ย Another good idea is toย just wait until you can have an actual conversation with that person.

2. โ€œItโ€™s overโ€

text message

Whatever your reason is,ย breaking up with someone via text message is extremely unacceptable. Sending a breakup text is cowardly, cold, and insensitive.

In any failing relationship, the other party deserves to know the reasons behind the breakup and have a formal closure. Althoughย ย initiating a breakup is awkward and uncomfortable, it's oneย of those times where you just have to bite the bullet and do it in person.

See Also:ย 5 Universal Truths to Tell Yourself After a Horrific Break-up

3. โ€œWhy are you mad at me?โ€

Avoid sending text messages that carry emotional weight to them. Tone and body language donโ€™t come through in a text, which means the message can beย misunderstood.

Feelings can get hurt if the person who receives the text takes it out of context or misconstrues your message. Conversations about arguments or sensitive subjects should be done in-person. If you truly want to sort out anย issue, text messaging isn't the best wayย to do so.

4. โ€œHey. Did you get my last text? Why arenโ€™t you responding?โ€

Sending messages like this will make you lookย needy and desperate. If you are feeling insecure, this type ofย messages wonโ€™t help you at all.

See Also:ย How Do I Get Him To Text Me Instead Of Me Texting Him All The Time?

Aside from creating the wrong impression on your end, the recipient may not like getting these messages either.If itโ€™s been a while before youโ€™ve heard from someone, it's best if you can put your phone away and just stop checking it every two minutes. If a person is into you, he'll find a way to respond as soon as he can.

5. โ€œThe silent textโ€

silent text

Regardless of whether you are not responding to the guy asking you out for a second date or are ignoring a friend's request to help her move, completely ignoring a text message is simply rude.

Theseย people will be waiting for you to text them back and they'll be checking their phone frequently to make sure they haven't missed your response. If you donโ€™t want to do something, just be upfront and honest. It will allow the other person to move on quicker and stop annoying you.

Sending a text is generallyย easier than picking up the phone and starting a conversation. However, as convenient as it seems, make sure that you stillย follow proper text etiquetteย whenever you send someone a message.ย Keep your texting for what it was made for: easy, light-hearted communications that donโ€™t have a lot of weight to them.

If youโ€™re questioning whether or not you should send that text, it's probably a better idea to justย wait andย reach out personally.

Dr. Kurt Smith

Dr. Kurt Smith is the Clinical Director of Guy Stuff Counseling & Coaching, a Northern California counseling practice that specializes in helping men and the women who love them. His expertise is in understanding men, their partners, and the unique relationship challenges couples face today. Dr. Kurt is a lover of dogs, sarcasm, everything outdoors, and helping those seeking to make their relationships better.

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