I know quite a few people who spend a fair bit of time thinking about all the might have beens, what-ifs and opportunities they’ve missed. They spend their lives constantly feeling like they’ve missed out on something big.
Their boat has sailed.
They’ve missed their one and only opportunity to be rich, famous and do something really amazing.
I know someone who used to enter the same numbers in the lottery every week. One week, she was too busy to get the ticket before the agency closed.
And her numbers came up.
There were no winners that week and the jackpot money rolled over to the following week: 10 million pounds.
She’s never forgiven herself. The lady that used to go halves on the tickets with her never forgave her either.
Since then (this happened more than 20 years ago), she’s lived her life feeling like she’s missed her boat, the only opportunity she’ll ever have to be happy. It’s gone and that’s it. She lived like she must be miserable, bitter and twisted because she failed to do something. She felt like she didn’t deserve to be anything else.
I suspect most of us would be pretty upset if that happened to us.
Now, the question is, would we allow it to rule the rest of our lives? Or should we consider the possibility that it happened for a reason?
What if, instead of spending more than 20 years beating herself up, that lady had said to herself:
“Isn’t it interesting that THAT happened? I wonder why it happened THAT way? Since I KNOW that everything always happens FOR me and not TO me, this happening can only be for my good. So, although it looks like a major setback, it’s neither a mistake nor a missed opportunity. Ooh, I wonder what life does have planned for me.”
Now, I’ll admit that I’d have a VERY hard time saying anything along those lines for quite a while if something like that happened to me.
But, if I knew that I was putting every effort into being wealthy or happy, then I would also know that just because something didn’t happen the way it OUGHT to happen, everything will still be alright. I will be able to relax and let it go.
Nothing ever happens TO me, but everything always happens FOR me.
Just because I can’t see how something can possibly be moving me towards my goals doesn’t mean it isn’t. So long as I’m keeping my eye on my goals, everything that happens is the Universe moving me towards my goals.
It’s definitely easier said than done, particularly at first.
But it is doable.
It’s simply a choice. You haven’t missed your boat. It just wasn’t the boat you thought it was. Your boat is still there.
Your boat is still waiting.
But, if you’re standing on the dock, staring at someone else’s boat, feeling miserable because you think you’ve missed out or you think someone else’s boat looks better or because you think your boat should look like that…
Then, you’re never going to get on your own boat.
You’re never going to live your own life.
Stop looking at someone else’s life and wishing yours was like that. Be present to what it is YOU want.
Tips On Achieving Goals
- Write about how you want your life to look in great detail.
- Keep writing it weekly at first, then monthly.
- Write a bucket list.
- Write about how your day is going to go EVERY DAY.
- Tell yourself how your life is going to go.
- Look for evidence that it’s going that way and ignore all evidence that contradict it.
- Focus and put energy into what IS working.
- Notice what ISN’T working and write about how you DO want it to look.
- Don’t waste time beating yourself up because things aren’t going as you think they ought to.
- Keep your eyes on the goal and move towards it.
Remember: Everything happens FOR you, not TO you.
Your boat is waiting for you. Don’t waste your life crying over someone else’s boat. Step onto your own.
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Author: Karen O'Connor
After 10 years of trying, I finally admitted that being a stay at home mum wasn't for me. Now I'm a writer, blogger, mindset expansion expert, property developer and entrepreneur, and a much happier wife and mum.