These days, the internet is full of confusing mixed messages. There is the message of “Be yourself! You’re beautiful no matter what you look like!” Then, there is the message of “You must look this exact way in order to be considered beautiful.”
Neither of those are necessarily true. Beauty is a standard and everyone has his own idea of what that looks like. You don’t meet everyone’s criteria and not everyone meets your criteria. That’s just how the world works.
This makes personal improvements tricky. When we hear things like “get in shape” or “get dressed up” or anything relating to becoming beautiful, our minds often go straight to models of some kind, whether Instagram or Victoria’s Secret.
We’re often overwhelmed by what we want to change about ourselves. We want to be perfect, but no one is perfect. We don’t like ourselves, but we don’t know what or how to change what we don’t like.
Instead of saying to yourself, “I want to be beautiful. I want to be skinnier. I want to be happier. I want to look like a Kardashian”, ask yourself this: What does being the best version of yourself look like?
This question takes all outward influences out of the picture. You don’t have to look like the models you see everywhere you look and you don’t need to look like anyone else. You can look like you.
Being The Best Version of Yourself
The best version of you might be ten pounds lighter or ten pounds heavier. You might have zit-free skin or you might have the perfect winged eyeliner look.
Maybe you drink more water and eat more bacon. Maybe you write in your notebook every day or smile at strangers more often. Or maybe you give your friends gifts more often or call your parents more. Perhaps you go out only Saturday nights, instead of Friday through Sunday. Maybe you finally do that thing you’ve been dreaming about for months.
People will still have their judgement to pass on you, even when you’re steadily working to better yourself. If you listen to them at all, take what they say with a grain of salt. What you do does not concern them and your happiness does not rely on them.
The important thing is to remember that you don’t look like anyone else, inside and out. There is a “best version” of yourself in you somewhere, even if sometimes it’s hard to find. Think about what you want to see from yourself, not what anyone else might want to see.