What to Do When Others Try to Kill Your Dream
You’re a dreamer.
But you’re also a dream-chaser.
You make your dreams happen – one goal at a time.
Sometimes, a lot of times, you may be filled with doubt and uncertainty.
Is this for real?
Are you really in the middle of the Saharas teaching English to African children?
Are you in Japan becoming a ninja?
Did you just quit your corporate job and start a freelance business in the Philippines?
When others doubt you
You may be doubting yourself and questioning your own dreams. Are you broke, lost and confused? Do you have it in you to make it happen?
Even worse, what will Jack down the street, his Mom and dog think of you? What do your parents tell their friends when they meet their friends for evening tennis?
“Little Annie is back-packing in Hungary? Johnny’s writing ebooks on his blog from remote locations?”
Unfortunately when you’re chasing dreams, others may try to bust them, block them, fight them, snatch them, stomp them away.
Because many believe that dreamers are losers.
Dreamers are poor. Confused, Unstable, Out of touch. Lost sense with what matters in the world.
Dreamers don’t do 9 to 5.
Dreamers sleep in the afternoons and work when there’s work to be done.
Dreamers don’t live lives that others live.
Dreams don’t do status quo. Or steady jobs. Or what’s been tried before. They fall. They get up. They fall some more. They get up some more. They almost look like they like falling because they like getting up. Getting up a little higher each time. Each time they get up quicker, higher, wiser.
But the doubters and haters only see the fall. Not the rising.
How to combat resistance
If you’re someone chasing your dream, you know that the resistance is strong. Everyone who gives you advice has a team of doubters and dream-crushers on their side.
Who do you have? Just you.
When they tell you that you should be doing something else with your life. Smile. Thank them for the advice and tell them you’ll consider what they say. They are wise and experienced so you will take their advice under consideration.
Very careful consideration. Of course, you’re going to consider how to make your dream come true. When they roll their eyes and laugh at your dream. Laugh along with them.
They laugh because they think they know better and you’re setting your life up for failure.
You laugh because you know a life not spent pursuing your dream is failure.
When they tell you about so and so, and his brother…
Oh, John and his two Ph.d’s. Ann and her move to New York to start work at that large accounting firm. When you hear about others, think about what the non-dreamers are missing out on.
Yes, they’ll value their paycheck but they’ll soon lose sight of what they value in life. Yes, they’re on a career-rise but a life-crisis is around the corner. Hear the stories of the so-called-successes because you’ll want to know the trap they’re falling into. You’ll want to know details because you might be the one who really has to be there for them when they stumble.
You’ll want to know what NOT to do with your life.
When they give you unsolicited advice
They’ll try to squash your dreams and bring your life to an orderly and respectable place. They will give you advice and tips that starts at your dream and veers you way off track.
“Yes, you should go to Italy, finish that cooking course, and travel around Europe. Then, you can come back, stop blogging and apply for grad school.”
A technology start-up sounds like a terrific idea. You can start up everything you want after dental school.”
Hear out their advice out, then tell them what your dream is. Again.
When they tell you, you suck
Not everyone will be a cheer-leader for your dreams. Most will be nay-sayers. “What do you mean you’re painting – you’re a horrible painter!”
“Why would you ever consider business? You sold 0 lemonade cups during those summers growing up.”
Listen to them. Then figure out how you’re really going to achieve their dream. Turn their hate and doubt into your fuel for action. Double down on your dream. Do no let them define you. Do not let them crush your dream.
You keep dreaming. You keep crushing it.
Keep writing. Keep telling your story. Keep learning. Keep improving. Keep doing. Keep moving. Continue with what your heart tells you and refuse to allow your detractors to stop you.
Know that you when you pursue your dream, you will be in line with your destiny. When you achieve your dream, you will inspire and help others around you accelerate theirs.
Pursuing your dreams will inspire your kids and the children of your generation. It will inspire the doubters and the haters. If you refuse to stop, they can’t stop you when you’ve made it.
Keep your dream alive. Fight for your dream. So others will be inspired to fight for theirs.