As I look back at my life, I can probably list a dozen people that I have never forgiven for something. I hold grudges for a long time and frankly I am as stubborn as they come. Yes I know, it is unhealthy to have this trait.
Early this morning I noticed someone's recent del.icio.us bookmark entitled, 9 Steps to Forgiveness. Out of curiosity I clicked because I know at some point, I should face the music but I also understand that there is no magic cure. I have to start by introducing a few simple strategies that will enable me to change my ways. This is very similar to the strategy that Mark is using to reduce his stress which he detailed a few weeks back.
From the article, here are the 3 things that I am going to slowly introduce into my life:
- Get the right perspective on what is happening. Recognize that your primary distress is coming from the hurt feelings, thoughts and physical upset you are suffering now, not what offended you or hurt you two minutes - or ten years -ago. Forgiveness helps to heal those hurt feelings.
- Make a commitment to yourself to do what you have to do to feel better. Forgiveness is for you and not for anyone else.
- Give up expecting things from other people, or your life , that they do not choose to give you. Recognize the "unenforceable rules" you have for your health or how you or other people must behave. Remind yourself that you can hope for health, love, peace and prosperity and work hard to get them.
